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Words shape our reality, especially when facing life-altering diagnoses. My cancer journey began December 7th, 2021—terrible timing for a small business owner with three ventures heading into the holiday rush. But beyond the logistical nightmare was an unexpected challenge: finding language that authentically described my experience.

Days after my diagnosis, while working alone in my shop trying to process genetic testing decisions, a well-meaning stranger approached. He insisted I was already a "survivor," though I'd barely begun facing cancer. As he continued his unsolicited pep talk, I felt increasingly disconnected from this label thrust upon me. The discomfort only deepened as others encouraged me to "stay in the fight" and "kick cancer's ass." Having served two deployments in Iraq, these battle metaphors rang hollow—I'd entered war feeling prepared and trained, while cancer left me feeling utterly vulnerable and unprepared.

Throughout treatment, I struggled to find accurate terminology. After surgery removed the tumor, I couldn't say "I have cancer," but "I had cancer" didn't capture my ongoing experience. What surprised me most was discovering that despite cancer's prevalence, we lack nuanced vocabulary for describing this complex journey. While some find empowerment in "survivor" or "thriver" labels, these terms can also create pressure or minimize ongoing challenges. The language that finally resonated for me was simply "someone who experienced cancer"—acknowledging what happened without letting it define me. What matters most is allowing each person to choose their own cancer terminology, honoring the deeply personal nature of this journey and the power of language to shape how we heal.

What terminology resonates with your cancer experience? Join the conversation and share your thoughts.

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