In this episode, we talk about the moment we first noticed the cracks in the foundation. Not the dramatic blow-ups, but the quiet, creeping signs that something wasn’t right. We unpack what kept us staying longer than we should have, how toxic systems train you to doubt your instincts, and the red-flag behaviors we no longer negotiate or explain away.

Leaving isn’t failure. Sometimes it’s the clearest act of self-trust there is.

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No heavy topics. No deep dives. Just us, a New Year’s Eve recording, holiday chaos, laughter, and letting ourselves enjoy the moment. Sometimes the most healing thing is simply being present.

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“Peace on Earth” sounds beautiful — until you read the fine print.

⚠️CW: This episode includes discussion of religious trauma, emotional abuse, family estrangement, divorce, and holiday-related triggers. Listener discretion advised.

In this episode, we talk honestly about what the holidays can feel like after religious trauma, estrangement, abuse, and financial survival mode.

We discuss:

• Why Christmas can trigger guilt, grief, and hypervigilance

• Navigating estrangement, separation, and complicated family dynamics

• The pressure to perform joy and forgiveness

• Being broke, burned out, and still expected to show up smiling

• Reclaiming peace without sacrificing yourself

This conversation is for anyone who feels relief and sadness at the same time during the holidays — and wonders if they’re doing something wrong.

You’re not.

You’re responding to what you lived through.

🎧 Listen on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify

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This episode includes discussion of spiritual abuse, emotional manipulation, domestic abuse, child endangerment, and references to sexual abuse within a religious context. Listener discretion is advised.

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👉 ko-fi.com/imonthephonepodcast

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In this episode, we discuss two deeply disturbing but necessary stories that reveal how power, theology, and silence collide in high-control church environments.

We unpack:

• A situation involving a known offender attending church while under restrictions around children

• How leadership failure placed responsibility on women instead of prioritizing child safety

• Why these patterns are not rare — and why survivors often struggle to name them

• A moment where forced forgiveness was demanded under threat of hell

• How spiritual authority is used to coerce compliance instead of protect victims

• The weaponization of sexual abuse stories to control behavior

• A situation involving a known offender attending church while under restrictions around children

• How leadership failure placed responsibility on women instead of prioritizing child safety

• Why these patterns are not rare — and why survivors often struggle to name them

This conversation is not about sensationalism.

It’s about recognizing systems that protect power over people, and why so many survivors leave feeling confused, silenced, or blamed.

If you’ve ever felt that something was deeply wrong but couldn’t quite articulate it — this episode is for you.

#SpiritualAbuse

#ChurchHurt

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#TraumaInform

In today’s episode, we analyze a sermon that starts with themes of sin and death… and then takes a disturbing turn.

What begins as a familiar fundamentalist message quickly spirals into:

• ​ Public humiliation from the pulpit
• ​ Objectification of women (and, strangely, men too)
• ​ Mockery, shaming, and dehumanizing language
• ​ Emotional manipulation packaged as “biblical truth”
• ​ Classic markers of high-control religious systems
• ​ The use of fear, shame, and disgust to regulate behavior
• ​ The psychology behind why these sermons “feel wrong” but are hard to name in real time

This sermon is a textbook example of how spiritual leaders use rhetoric, tone, and public humiliation to maintain compliance and social hierarchy in the church.

If you grew up in fundamentalism, IFB, holiness, or any high-control church… this one may hit close to home.

You are not imagining it.

You were not too sensitive.

This is psychological control — and once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

⸻

🔗 Original sermon link:

https://youtu.be/4HAYDb8N1yw?si=6zjLSzggZESy1RpV

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⸻

If this kind of analysis helps you untangle your own story, please leave a review.

It helps other survivors and deconstructors find the show.

In Episode 14, we break down a story of religious conditioning, manipulation, and identity loss inside high-control church culture. Christy shares how a pastor’s wife “guided” her child’s music preferences—teaching him to hide his real feelings—and we dive into how patriarchy and purity culture shape kids from the start.

🎙️ Music, Manipulation, & Religious Conditioning

Available on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify.

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Mentioned in the podcast:

The Eden Podcast with Bruce C.E. Fleming

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-eden-podcast-with-bruce-c-e-fleming/id1536987547

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👉 If last week’s episode hit you hard, this is the follow-up you’ve been waiting for.

This week, we’re responding to your voices.

Episode 13 dives into the impact last week’s conversation had on our community — and a powerful listener letter that put so many of our experiences into words.

We talk about what hit us the hardest, what surprised us, and how hearing your stories continues to shape this podcast.

If you’ve ever felt alone in your journey out of high-control religion, this episode is for you. 💛

🎧 Listen now on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, and Spotify.

Your story matters — thank you for trusting us with it.

What happens when a “holiness” sermon turns into a masterclass in manipulation?

In this episode of I’m on the Phone, Sara and Christy break down a 1983 camp meeting sermon — a fiery display of shame, DARVO, and spiritual power plays aimed straight at a pastor’s wife.

This one’s part analysis, part reaction, and 100% unmasking how control hides behind the pulpit.

⚠️ Content note: religious trauma, psychological manipulation, and public shaming

👂 Listen now wherever you get your podcasts.

🔗Sermon link

https://youtu.be/Xm4yT5TM6uA?si=SCVO3jxdablZ-dOq%20

#ImOnThePhonePodcast #ReligiousTrauma #SpiritualAbuse #HighControlReligion #PurityCulture #ChurchTrauma #CultRecovery #FaithDeconstruction #Gaslighting #DARVO #ReligiousManipulation #HolinessMovement #Fundamentalism #PodcastForSurvivors #Exvangelical

What happens after “the board meeting” ?

When the shame, the fear, and the expectation to repent, obey, and submit don’t just end — they follow you into adulthood.

In this week’s episode, I talk about how we were conditioned to respond when we were in the “hot seat,” what dating looked like under purity culture, and how those old reflexes still show up today — even when we know better.

🎧 Listen now:

📝 Leave us a voice note or letter to include in our podcast!

📬 Contact: [email protected]

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💬 Have you ever caught yourself reacting like you’re still “in the room”? Tell me below. ⤵️

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Ever been part of a “holy hustle”? 👀

This week, we’re diving into the Phone-a-thon days, the unspoken rules of being a pastor’s wife, and one college experience that crossed every boundary of personal space. 😬

It’s honest, a little unhinged, and definitely positively wrong.

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👇 Drop a 🖤 in the comments if you’ve ever had a “church story” that still makes you shake your head.

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