Relationships end for all kinds of reasons, but the ones we tend to think of most are the biggies; infidelity, lying, cheating or the vague yet poignant “irreconcilable differences”. But what about all those small moments. The ones when observed in isolation don’t mean much, but when there are hundreds, maybe even thousands of small moments like taking each other for granted, making decisions without considering the other person, avoiding problems, fighting to win, undermining one another, relying on each other too much, unrealistic expectations….. And the list goes on. It’s like relationship death by 1,000 tiny paper-cuts. In today's episode we explore what these micro moments are, why they happen and how to recognise them before they end your relationship.

Matthew Fray is a relationship coach, writer and author of the new book "This is How Your Marriage Ends: A Hopeful Approach to Saving Relationships." His work has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Atlantic, The Times and Sunday Times in London, The Financial Times, and The Daily Mail. He is based in Cleveland, Ohio in the United States and is the father of a 13-year-old son.

We chat 

• The micro moments in your relationship that can feel like paper cuts
• Why relationships don’t always end for the big reasons
• Increasing your self awareness and practicing empathy 
• How invalidating your person and their feelings is a fast-track to either a shitty relationship or it ending 

 

Better Relationships

We empower couples to create thriving relationships so that they can play all out in life, set big goals and put plans in place to actually achieve them Better World Many research studies have shown that great relationships are associated with better health, greater happiness, and even a longer life. If more of us had thriving, healthy, happy romantic relationships, we know we would have a better world. That's why, every time someone works with us, via our partnership with Buy1Give1 we also help someone else in the world. Yep a stranger, someone you'll never meet.

Connect with Sammi & Nathan Jaeger 

Website - https://www.fuelcollective.com.au/ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/thefuelcollective Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/thrivingcouples/ Twitter - https://twitter.com/fuel_collective Instagram - Date Forever - https://www.instagram.com/dateforever/ Instagram - Fuel Collective - https://www.instagram.com/fuel.collective/ Instagram - Nath - https://www.instagram.com/nathjaeger/ Instagram - Sammi - https://www.instagram.com/sammisomewhere/

Connect with Matthew Fray

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/frayrelationships/ Website - https://matthewfray.com/Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/matthewfrayMBTTTR/

Resources

This is how your Marriage Ends - Matthew Fray