My name is John. Today I am going to take to the microphone and, on this special episode of Intervals, give you a sense of what it’s really like to live under the brutal and maniacal dictatorship of my Dad: Steve Runner. For today I hope to uncover the truth for you: that my father is a warped, twisted old man who refuses to buy me a puppy. As you listen to this episode, I hope you’ll come to appreciate my plight and do everything you can to rescue me from a life with Steve Runner.