In this episode of the Beautifully Complex podcast, I’m taking a deep dive into the concept of "can't versus won't" when examining a child's behavior. It’s important to understand that the majority of the time, when a child is struggling, it is a "can't" rather than a "won't," even when it feels like an undoubtable won’t. I cover the complexities involved in assessing the "doability" of tasks for neurodivergent kids and provide an acronym, "DESKS," to help parents and educators analyze the factors that contribute to a task's doability for that child. Each factor plays a significant role in determining whether a child can or cannot complete a task without significant support or accommodations. Learn to approach challenges with empathy and understanding, and the framework required to assess doability to support children in overcoming barriers to achieving success.

244: Is It Can’t or Won’t?, with Penny Williams

Join parenting coach and mom-in-the-trenches, Penny Williams, as she helps parents, caregivers, and educators harness the realization that we are all beautifully complex and marvelously imperfect. Each week she delivers insights and actionable strategies on parenting and educating neurodivergent kids — those with ADHD, autism, anxiety, learning disabilities... Her approach to decoding behavior while honoring neurodiversity, and parenting the individual child you have will provide you with the tools to help you understand and transform behavior, reduce your own stress, increase parenting confidence, and create the joyful family life you crave. Penny has helped thousands of families worldwide to help their kids feel good so they can do good.

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The terms IEP and 504 plan may come up a lot when you’re looking into special education for your child. These school supports do some of the same things, but one can provide more services and the other is easier to get. And it’s important to know the differences in order to get your child the support they need. On this episode of Beautifully Complex, you will hear an episode of Understood Explains, where host Juliana Urtubey breaks down the differences between IEPs and 504 plans, and which one might be right for your child.

263: Understood Explains IEPs from Understood.org

In this episode, I'm chatting with my guest Daniel Maigler, about the transformative roles of emotional support animals. Dan's insights as a social worker and mental health advisor for Paws for Patrick reveal how emotional support animals can aid those facing mental health challenges.
Dan shares the poignant story behind Paws for Patrick, emphasizing the support ESAs can offer, especially to young people. Throughout this episode, he differentiates between therapy dogs, service animals, and emotional support animals, clarifying common misconceptions.
From legalities to the non-requirement of training for ESAs, we're tackling the myths and discussing the urgency for more emotional support options in schools. For any listener interested in the healing potential of animals and understanding the process for obtaining an ESA, this episode provides clarity and heartfelt testimony.

262: Emotional Support Animals, with Dan Maigler, LCSW

In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I tackle why our kids and teens might use extreme language to express their emotions. We're recognizing that expressions like "I hate you" or phrases that include aggression or violence often aren't literal but signal an inability to articulate complex emotions.
I talk about the importance of distinguishing between different feelings and emphasize the role parents play in guiding their kids to understand and communicate their emotions more precisely. Through my experiences and the stories I share — like my child's alarming description of a recess incident — I highlight how easy it is to misunderstand our kids' emotional needs.
We'll unpack essential skills like social emotional learning, interoception, and how to be the calm anchor for your kids. Listen in for practical strategies to improve your child’s emotional communication.

261: Extreme Language Around Emotions, with Penny Williams

Brooks Gibbs, Ph.D. is joining me for a conversation on Insights on Bullying: Understanding Aggression, Building Resilience. His expertise in social psychology shines a light on the intricate dance between aggression and resilience — especially in the lives of our neurodivergent kids.
In this episode, you'll hear stories close to my heart, including my son's journey through the world of teasing and the delicate balance of parenting a child who sees the world literally. Dr. Gibbs offers thought-provoking perspectives on empathy, teaching us about rational compassion and how it can be a game-changer in our parenting toolkit.
We'll also discuss the provocative idea of the therapeutic role of horror and drama films in building mental flexibility, and Dr. Gibbs will introduce questions that can profoundly shift our approach to challenges. Moreover, we'll address the emotional challenges faced by individuals with autism and alexithymia, emphasizing the need for strong advocacy and support.
As we dissect the shortcomings of traditional anti-bullying campaigns, Dr. Gibbs proposes a fresh focus on mental health and resilience. And I'll share my evolution from overprotective parenting to encouraging my child's growth in frustration tolerance and independence.

259: Insights on Bullying: Understanding Aggression, Building Resilience, with Brooks Gibbs, Ph.D.

In this episode of Beautifully Complex, I have the pleasure of talking with Shari Leid of An Imperfectly Perfect Life. Together, we’re talking about purposeful living and parenting and celebrating gradual progress over the pursuit of perfection.
Shari shares her deep insights on the value of recognizing and fostering the inherent strengths in our children. We confront societal expectations head-on, discussing the critical importance of valuing imperfections and the individuality of each journey. This episode is rich with reflection on the concepts of resilience and authenticity in the context of modern parenting.

244: Is It Can’t or Won’t?, with Penny Williams

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