Is he real or a figment of my imagination or unhealed traumas? Is my boyfriend a Incubus spirit and what does that sort of spirit look like? The Incubus spirit is a male demonic sexual spirit that seeks sexual encounters from woman. Are these Incubus & Succubus spirits hidden aspects of ourselves that we repress based on shame, fear, unexplored desires.. Im going to pull my notes out and dig deeper in my next episode.