Doing Marriage Well

Is the False Consensus Effect Hurting Your Marriage?


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In this episode of Doing Marriage Well (May 21, 2026), Paul explains three cognitive biases that can damage relationships: the Zanargic effect (remembering unfinished tasks more than completed ones), negativity bias (focusing on problems over positives), and the false consensus effect (assuming your partner shares your views).

Paul offers a simple remedy: question your assumptions, ask clarifying questions, and intentionally notice the positive moments to counter these biases.

He closes with a reminder that every marriage is different – and a lighthearted dispute over the "right" way to hang toilet paper.

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Doing Marriage WellBy paulb5d