This week, we investigate new “evidence” that Bigfoot didn’t vanish, but that he adapted. A 2026 study proposes Sasquatch migrated indoors, integrating into state politics via what it calls Bureaucratic Integration Theory (BIT). We follow the data trail from laundry-room DNA to extreme suit engineering and a style of debate best described as the guttural affirmative. After this, C-SPAN may feel… differently alive.