The Unwanted Sorority

It Was Like We Were Having an Out of Body Experience: Brenda & Leroy Tate on Parenting a Rape Survivor


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In this powerful and deeply personal episode of The Unwanted Sorority, host Dr. Leatra Tate sits down with the two people who raised her, Brenda and Leroy Tate, for a multigenerational conversation on healing, community, and the legacy of silence around sexual violence in Black families. Leroy Tate, a retired Air Force veteran, reflects on his upbringing in a tight-knit Black community, his thoughts on masculinity, fatherhood, and his raw response to learning about his daughter’s assault. Brenda Tate, a retired administrative assistant and mother of three, opens up about growing up in the 1960s, how community centers shaped her childhood, and the heartbreak and self-blame she experienced upon hearing her daughter’s disclosure. Together, they talk candidly about: the generational shift in how Black communities discuss sexual violence, how the fear of judgment and distrust in policing impacted responses to assault in the 1960s, Parenting through trauma without a guidebook, and the urgent need for more Black mentors in youth-centered programs like Big Brothers Big SistersThis episode is a moving example of what it looks like to confront the past, lean into vulnerability, and choose healing together—even when it's hard. It honors Black family, community resilience, and the sacred act of telling the truth.


Resources & Mentions

bell hooks books referenced: Ain’t I a Woman? Black Women and Feminism (1981), Bone Black: Memories of Girlhood (1996), All About Love: New Visions (2000), Feminism Is for Everybody: Passionate Politics (2000), Salvation: Black People and Love (2001), and The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love (2004).

Big Brothers Big Sisters- Mentoring Programs

CapRadio episode titled “Sexual assault survivors want less police, more trauma-informed professionals, especially for Black victims

INCITE! Women of Color Against Violence- History & Community Accountability Toolkit 

Incite Collaboration- Community Accountability 

Transformative Justice EU- TJ 101

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