August slipped away like a bottle of wine... welcome to the August Swift Report. Karlie Kloss showed up to the Eras Tour, and unlike Adam Sandler, was not invited to the VIP tent. No It's Ashley has stirred up controversy, again, by hiring body guards and walking around in public cosplaying as Taylor for a "prank" that's also a "social experiment." Taylor gave bonuses totaling $55 million to those working the Eras Tour! Swifties potentially ruined Jack Antonoff's rehearsal dinner and wedding. Yuck.

Thank you to Jay_You, for the Swift Report jingle.

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