In this podcast, Monk and I read and answer a letter about how to meet kinky romantic partners, and then a letter from a woman who is struggling with her feelings about humiliation in BDSM porn and erotica, and who is wondering if being African-American is part of that. Take-home quote: "It's only porn if you make money from it. If you're not going to make any money from it, it's not porn, it's erotica." (Ten minutes, definitely not work safe.)