Knowing When to Quit

Back in November 2022, I invited my very good friend, author and journalist Kim Willis, onto the pod.

At the time I was 37 and she was 41 and we were DEEP in the question about children. Whether we wanted them, whether we could/would/should have them, and crucially what a life would like without them. Were we ready to ‘quit’ the idea of having children?

The episode was shared widely and we were inundated with messages from people thanking us for having such a frank conversation, and sharing their stories too.

3.5 years on, we’ve decided to have a follow up conversation.

I’m now 40 and Kim is 44, and life has changed quite dramatically for both of us.

In this conversation we share:

* What it was like listening back to a time capsule of ourselves from 2022 and noticing what we were longing for back then.

* The big reveal - do we now have children..?

* How much grief, uncertainty and loneliness we were carrying in our late 30s and early 40s, and how different life feels today.

* How we’ve met our needs for ‘family’ and ‘purpose’ in unexpected and beautiful ways:

* Kim shares what happened when she stopped waiting for a particular version of the future and followed an unexpected creative calling.

* I talk about finding the connection, belonging and family I was longing for in ways I never could have predicted.

* Together, we celebrate becoming the role models we most needed a few years ago.

Enjoy the episode!

Buy Kim's book - No Fair Maidens: https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/468042/no-fair-maidens-by-willis-kim/9781529947847

Kim's website - https://www.kim-willis.com/

Kim's IG - @_kimwillis

Sarah's website - www.sarahweiler.com

Sarah's IG - @sarahweilermusic

Podcast Art - Tom Paulin

Edited by Sarah Weiler

Music composed by Sarah Weiler

Today, I'm speaking to the wonderful Zahra Davidson about her process of letting go of being CEO of her organisation, Huddlecraft.

Zahra spent 8 years founding and developing Huddlecraft, a social enterprise specialising in peer-to-peer learning, action and change. In spring this year Zahra stepped back after a 15 month transition process, handing over navigation of Huddlecraft to Dan Ford and Anna Garlands.

Zahra has been sharing her letting go journey with me via voice notes, and we've shared this journey publicly through a Substack series called 'Snakeskin' (link at bottom).

Zahra continues to support Huddlecraft as a non exec director and associate, and is currently working independently with the Collective Imagination Practice Community, Thirty Percy Foundation, the Transformational Governance Collective and the Many-to-Many Governance Learning Network.

Zahra’s work asks how people can be more than the sum of their parts, together.

Huddlecraft - https://www.huddlecraft.com/

Zahra's Substack 'Snakeskin' - https://zahradavidson.substack.com/

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in October 2024 in Brighton

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

Today we're talking to Sieske Valk about the difficult, and often avoided part of pet ownership - the end of their life.

Sieske is an End of Life Doula and an advocate for ageing pets; She guides pet guardians through the autumn of their best friend's life.

Combining a background in veterinary medicine and the social sciences, she has set up Autumn Animals to support people in maintaining a good quality of life for both their pets and themselves and to hold space for celebrating the human-animal bond until the end and beyond. 

In this episode we discuss:

• Why it is so hard for people to end the life of their pets
• What happens when we give attention to the end of a pet’s life?
• What can be done to support the guardian of the pet who is about to die?
• How do we know when it’s time? What signs should you look for?
• Sieske attitude towards death , being Dutch and coming from a Hindu background
• Beautiful stories about letting go of pets - how can a pet have a really good autumn?
• What the process is once people have made the decision to euthanise their pet, and how can it be done in a dignified way
• What are the different ways you can honour the pet after they’ve died?

Sieske and I also met 8 months after the recording with an update on Autumn Animals - I wanted to include this as it's a really interesting discussion about taking a pause from a business venture in order to recharge. This doesn't mean the project is over, it is actually the opposite!

- - -

Sieske's IG: https://www.instagram.com/autumnanimalslondon/

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

Welcome back writer, journalist and strategist Kim Willis to the show! You may remember Kim from series 2 when we talked about Knowing When To Quit the desire to have children (the pod's most downloaded episode to date).

Today we're back discussing Kim's decision to quit her creative project Heroine's Journey - an event series, which championed female storytelling. At the point of recording (November 2022) Kim had just closed the business and was facing the void. Now in April 2024 there are updates about what happened in the void, so stay tuned to the end!

On the episode we discuss:

• Why Kim started Heroine's Journey and what it means to be ending it
• How we are hard-wired to need stories, but how trauma storytelling is being weaponised
• Kim's attempts to re-inject the project with new energy and new direction
• What is the void and why do we struggle with it so much?
• Rituals and learnings from Sarah closing her comedy night
• What is Kim actually quitting by closing HJ
• A voicenote from future Kim with what happened next

Kim's website: https://www.wherewegrow.co.uk/

Kim's newsletter: https://wherewegrow.substack.com/

Kimstagram: @_kimwillis and @heroinesjourney_/

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in November 2022 in person in Hackney

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

Always wanted to go freelance? Today I'm talking to Anna Codrea-Rado - a journalist, podcaster and campaigner, whose writing has appeared in the New York Times, The Guardian, BBC and many others. I brought Anna on as a specialist in working life and freelancing. She's the author of 'You're The Business' - a book which supports people to make it alone. She knows the questions to ask if you're thinking of making the switch, and is realistic about the struggles as well as celebrating the real highs that come with a more autonomous lifestyle.

In today's episode we discuss:

📆 Anna relationship to 'being busy'

📋 What made Anna go 'properly freelance' in 2017

✋ The difference between being pushed or pulled to freelancing

🧑🏻‍💻 The burnout that comes with being public-facing and why Anna has taken a break

🧠 Why Anna now charges for people to 'pick her brains'

🛑 Quitting and un-quitting her newsletter

⚓️ What an 'anchor client' is and why you need one as a freelancer

Anna on X and IG: @annacod

Anna's Book: 'You're the Business'

Anna's Podcast: 'Is This Working?'

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in May 2023 over Zoom

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

Today we're talking about Knowing When to quit relationships. We live in a society which tells us that the hallmark of a good relationship is one that lasts for a long time, but does that mean that we often stay in relationships too long? Today's guest is Rosie Wilby - an award-winning comedian, author, speaker and the creator of global hit podcast and book The Breakup Monologues. Rosie believes that breakups shouldn't be feared, and that there can even be a world of joy and creativity waiting for us on the other side of heartbreak.

In this episode we discuss:

💔 Why people find it so hard to get out of a bad relationship

🏓 The concept of 40-love (meeting your partner post 40)

🎨 How creativity can support in processing a break up and how we're often more creative after a break up

🥰 What we can learn about the poly community about break ups

⏱ Is length of time together always the marker of success?

🖥 The heartache of professional break ups

🎭 Breaking up with the Edinburgh Fringe

💊 Should we use drugs to help us fall out of love?

Podcast: podfollow.com/breakupmonologues

Book: https://linktr.ee/breakupmonologues

Twitter @rosiewilby

Insta / Threads @breakupmonologues

TikTok @rosiewilbyauthor

Buy and review Rosie's book - The Unexpected Joy of Heartbreak - https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1472982282

KNOWING WHEN TO QUIT

Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Sarah's newsletter - Sarahweiler.substack.com

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in June 2023 over Zoom

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

This is part 2 of a double episode with Dr Jude Galea on her decision to quit the medical profession after 20 years.

This is a live coaching session where we explore this decision. At the end you'll hear a voice note from a few week's after the recording, with a final update.

Thanks again, Jude for allowing us into your process.

Dr Jude Galea is an A+E doctor of 20 years, the founder of the Witchy Women platform, and host the of the podcast Dr Body Mind Soul, both of which help people inform themselves about alternative therapies away from western medicine.

Jude's instagram: @dr.bodymindsoul

Jude's website: drbodymindsoul.com

Jude's podcast: Dr Body Mind Soul -https://open.spotify.com/show/21GjmriufmyDNg0BRUasXp?si=3dd97665af5b4caa

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Sarah's newsletter: https://sarahweiler.substack.com/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in March 2023

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

I am so excited about today's episode, which is part 1 of a 2 part series with Dr Jude Galea - she's an A+E doctor of 20 years, the founder of the Witchy Women platform -  and host the of the podcast Dr Body Mind Soul, both of which help people inform themselves about alternative therapies away from western medicine. Jude is changing the conversation about medicine and is in the process going through a big personal transformation with her identity as a doctor.

The episode you're going to hear today was recorded exactly a year ago in May 2022 when Jude was taking a break from being an A+E doctor and living in Mexico, setting up her business.

At this point a year ago she's very much still weighing up whether she should leave the medical profession and can see pros and cons for both leaving and staying. 

In next week's episode we will see where she has got to one year on in terms of the decision to leave.

The process of putting these two episodes side by side really highlights to me just how hard the decision to quit can be. It's rarely an overnight decision, it's complex and it can take a lot of processing.

Thank you, Jude for sharing your story and allowing us to accompany you in your exploration of what it means for you to quit or remain in the medical profession.

I know Jude is sharing this episode on her podcast too, so if you're listening there. Welcome to this very special two part episode of Knowing When to Quit.

In this episode we discuss:

🩺 Jude's relationship with being 'a doctor' and why she decided to be a doctor in the first place

🛑 When she first wanted to quit medicine

🥳 What medicine HAS given her over the years and why she's stayed

🧙‍♀️Jude's exploration of alternative therapies and what she's doing to change the narrative

💜 What we mean by 'healing' and how the body works naturally

🌱 Jude's experience with plant medicine and how it's informed her decision to leave

Jude's instagram: @dr.bodymindsoul

Jude's website: drbodymindsoul.com

Jude's podcast: Dr Body Mind Soul -https://open.spotify.com/show/21GjmriufmyDNg0BRUasXp?si=3dd97665af5b4caa

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Sarah's newsletter: https://sarahweiler.substack.com/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in May 2022 over Zoom

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

Today's show I have the wonderful Selina Barker - life design and career change coach, the author of Burnt Out, and founder of 'Project You' and the Hello 2023 Goodbye 2022 journal series.

Selina was my entry point into designing a life I loved when I took her course back in 2013, and so it was a wonderful full circle to have her on the pod today. 

In this episode we discuss:

🔥How we sometimes have to quit the big dream we've had for our careers

💜 Why quitting is a really important part of designing a life we love

😴 The importance of taking a proper break between projects (inspired by her 7 year old son!)

☕️ Why everyone thinks they want to work in a café (or be a potter)

📚 The reality of getting a book published - the highs and lows

✍️ Why Selina ended up self-publishing and advice for wannabe authors

Listen out at the end for a free guide that you can download, which I am happy to say was inspired by this conversation about whether to wait for a publisher. Selina said 'why wait for a book deal when I can enjoy writing it now and can share it straight away. And I have LOVED the process.' 

You can find out more about Selina at selinabarker.com and you wearprojectyou.com

Selina's socials: @_weareprojectyou and @selinathecoach

Download Selina's new guide: weareprojectyou.com/theguide

Knowing When to Quit: Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage: www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Sarah's newsletter: https://sarahweiler.substack.com/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in March 2023

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler

Emily is a secondary school teacher in Yorkshire and when we met a few months ago she was really grappling with whether to stay in the profession. She was exhausted from the workload, the children and the families and was wondering if this was the right job for her.

As many of you know, I also started my career in teaching and have recently returned to education to coach teachers.  In this episode you'll listen to a coaching session between me and Emily where we explore what she wants out of a job and whether she can really be her authentic self in the classroom. I'm really grateful to Emily for allowing listeners a chance to listen to this conversation.

For some context this was the first time we'd had a coaching session together, but we had had two conversations beforehand.

The coaching style I use is mainly based on the Co-Active Model and the coaching session is unedited apart from a few pauses that we have shortened for brevity. 

If you're a teacher who is struggling with whether to stay in the classroom and you'd like some support, or a school who wants to explore coaching do reach out at [email protected]

Knowing When to Quit - Instagram - @knowingwhentoquit

Podcast homepage - www.sarahweiler.com/podcast/

Coaching for Teachers - www.coachingforteachers.co.uk/hello

Coactive Coaching - https://coactive.com/training/coach-training/

Editor - Johnny Hall / Music - Sarah Weiler / Artwork - Tom Pauling

This was recorded in March 2023

WANT TO SUPPORT THIS PODCAST? You can buy me a coffee here: https://ko-fi.com/sarahweiler