Less Drama More Mama

For the past few years, I've taught nervous system tools to moms from my quiet home office.

This fall, I put them to the test when I spent three months back at the school where I used to work as a counselor.

I didn't handle every moment perfectly, but I could feel how much more capacity I had to stay calm and respond thoughtfully than I did the last time I worked there, five years ago.

In this week's podcast episode, I share what I noticed, what helped, and why the experience made me even more certain about working with moms to teach them nervous system tools.

Your kids learn how to regulate partly by watching you do it. When you have tools to calm your own nervous system, you can model and teach the skills they need most.

• How learning nervous system tools helps you stay grounded when your kids are struggling
• What my students learned from watching me close my eyes in the middle of a lesson
• Why logic and reassurance usually don't get through to an upset child, and what to do first
• Why home, more than school, is where kids get the practice they need to build emotional and self-control skills

• Episode 427 - Are You Making Self-Control Harder for Your Child? (Self-Control Series, Part 1) Episode 428 - How to Help Kids Think Before They Speak (Self-Control Series, Part 2) Episode 429 - How to Help Kids Keep Their Hands to Themselves (Self-Control Series, Part 3)
• Join the Damn Good Mama wait list HERE.
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.

"Keep your hands to yourself."

You've probably said it more times than you can count, and your child can likely repeat the rule right back to you.

So why do they still push, grab, and hit?

Knowing the expectation and following it in the moment are two very different skills.

This is the final episode in my three-part series on self-control. I'm talking about physical self-control, which includes helping kids keep their hands off other people and their things, respect personal space, stay in control of their bodies when feelings get big, and understand consent.

You'll hear how to practice these skills at home, what to do when your child is hitting or pushing, what this looks like with tweens and teens, and how your own history shapes the way you react when your kids get physical.

This episode is packed with real stories and strategies you can start using this week.

• Why knowing the expectation isn't enough, and what helps your child choose a better option in the moment
• What the research says about hitting a pillow to "get the anger out"
• How everyday moments of consent at home prepare your child for dating and relationships later
• Why your child's physical behavior can bring up fear in you, and how to respond to what's happening

• Episode 427 - Are You Making Self-Control Harder for Your Child? (Self-Control Series, Part 1)
• Episode 428 - How to Help Kids Think Before They Speak (Self-Control Series, Part 2)
• Read about the 2024 Ohio State review of 154 studies on anger HERE.
• Join the Damn Good Mama wait list HERE.
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

You've told your child not to interrupt.

You've explained why their comment was rude.

You've reminded them to mind their own business.

Then they interrupt again or make another comment that would have been better left unsaid, and you wonder how many reminders it'll take before something changes.

In this week's podcast episode, I'm talking about what makes verbal self-control so difficult and how you can help your child develop it.

• Why reminders and corrections don't always lead to lasting change
• What can make interrupting, blurting, and unnecessary comments so hard for kids to stop
• How to help your child practice verbal self-control in everyday moments

• Episode 427 - Are You Making Self-Control Harder for Your Child? (Self-Control Series, Part 1)
• I Can't Believe You Said That by Julia Cook
• Join the Damn Good Mama wait list HERE.
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

Self-control is one of the hardest skills for kids to learn, and one of the most important.

It's what helps them wait their turn, keep working when something feels hard, and handle frustration without falling apart or giving up.

Today kicks off a three-part series on the podcast about helping kids develop self-control.

In today's episode, I share how you can help your child build emotional self-control.

In the coming weeks, I'll focus on verbal and physical self-control.

• How everyday parenting decisions can unintentionally make self-control harder to develop
• Why emotional self-control grows through practice and how to help your child build it
• A simple tool that helps kids practice self-control and recognize their progress

• Join the Damn Good Mama wait list HERE.
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

Do you wish you had more friends, but find yourself hesitating to reach out?

You might think you don't have the time or that making friends takes too much effort.

You might assume other moms already have plenty of friends, are too busy, or wouldn't be interested.

Those thoughts can make it harder to take the first step and get to know someone.

This week, I'm replaying an older episode about making new friends where I talk about common thoughts that can get in the way and how to create more opportunities for connection.

• How your thinking can affect the way you approach new people
• The assumptions about yourself and others that may be keeping you from making friends
• Questions to help you think about the friendships you want and how to move toward them

• Episode 043 - Overcoming Loneliness
• Episode 045 - Keeping Friendship Strong
• Episode 006 - Your Solution to Any Problem
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

Your child talks back, lies about something small, or ignores your directions.

You wonder: If this is happening now, what will they be like five years from now?

In this week's episode, I'm talking about why worry about your child's future can make their current behavior feel so urgent, how that worry shapes your reactions, and how to respond to what's actually happening.

• Why your mind can move so quickly from today's behavior to a frightening future
• How to recognize when urgency is shaping your response
• How to address behavior while leaving room for your child to grow

• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

Your child is yelling because you said no, talking to you disrespectfully, or following you around trying to change an answer you've already given.

You're trying to stay calm, but part of you is thinking, How much of this am I supposed to put up with?

"Expanding your window of tolerance" can sound like learning to become more patient with behavior you don't want to allow.

So what are you actually learning to tolerate?

Tune in to today's episode to find out.

• What expanding your window of tolerance actually asks you to tolerate
• How to hold a limit when your child is upset with it
• What to do with your anger instead of suppressing it or taking it out on your child
• Why timing matters when you address your child's behavior

• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

"Why am I always so tired?"

"Why are my kids so disrespectful?"

"Why is parenting so hard?"

These can sound like self-reflection questions, but the assumptions built into them can keep leading you back to the same answers.

This week, I'm bringing back one of the earliest episodes of the podcast because its central idea still holds true:

The questions you ask shape what you notice and the answers you find.

In this episode, I explain how to recognize questions that leave you feeling defeated and replace them with questions that help you understand yourself, consider new possibilities, and decide what you want to do next.

• Why some questions that sound reflective can leave you feeling even more stuck
• How the assumptions inside a question influence the answers your mind looks for
• Five questions that can help you examine your thoughts and find your own answers

• Click here for your FREE 50 Powerful Questions download
• Do You 10Q? website
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

Your child's teacher says they had a great day, but once they get home, the smallest thing sends them over the edge.

After-school meltdowns can make it seem as though your child saved their worst behavior for you, but there may be more contributing to the reaction.

In this episode, I'm looking at the demands your child manages at school, the transition home, and what happens during the afternoon.

I'm also sharing how to stay grounded when your child is overwhelmed, hold boundaries without arguing, and recognize when the pattern deserves more attention.

• Why kids can manage themselves at school and fall apart at home
• What may be adding pressure before and after they walk through the door
• How to keep your child's meltdown from becoming yours
• How to hold limits and address aggressive or destructive behavior

• Episode 035 - Consequences with Love
• Get on the Damn Good Mama waitlist HERE.
• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts

The school nurse's number flashes on your phone again.

Your child has a stomachache, a headache, or another symptom that feels serious enough to make them want to leave school. They've been medically checked, and everything appears to be normal.

The nurse says they're okay. Your child insists they're not.

Now you're caught between two concerns: What if you overlook something important? What if picking them up reinforces school avoidance by teaching them that leaving is the only way to feel better?

There's another possibility besides "They're sick" or "They're trying to get out of class."

Your child's body could be responding to something their mind hasn't recognized or put into words.

• What your child's body may be communicating when medical tests are normal
• How your own nervous system influences what happens after the nurse calls
• How to support your child without dismissing their symptoms or making it easier to avoid what feels hard

• Download my free Nervous System Reset Guide for Moms HERE.
• Buy and leave a review for the Less Drama More Mama book HERE.
• Subscribe to get email updates on Less Drama More Mama webinars, workshops, and special offers HERE.
• Follow Less Drama More Mama on Facebook and Instagram.
• Leave a review of the show in Apple Podcasts