Wilbur Ross, the Man in the $600 Embroidered Slippers, doesn't understand why furloughed federal workers visit food banks instead of the other sort. Maybe it's because they're pretty certain they won't see him there anytime soon.

Recorded using a Zoom H5 Handy Recorder and Shure SM58 mic. Edited on a 2014 MacBook Pro using Apple's Garageband. "Ahoy, polloi," lifted from "Caddyshack" using Rogue Amoeba's Audio Hijack. The background music, "Stay Away," comes from www.zapsplat.com. Dog eating from peridactyloptrix via www.freesound.org.

Remember, Wilbur, the Big Dog always eats last.