What does it mean to be a man? For centuries, cultures around the world have provided clear answers through rituals, traditions, and communal expectations. But in modern Western society, that certainty has crumbled, leaving many men grasping for ways to prove themselves—often in the most toxic and destructive ways. Instead of embracing maturity, they perform masculinity, desperately posturing for validation. And now, we’re witnessing a troubling new phenomenon: the rise of the "Broligarchy"—a ruling class of insecure men wielding power not with wisdom, but with bravado, aggression, and an insatiable need to dominate.

This crisis of masculinity is not just a cultural quirk; it represents an existential threat to society. When power is concentrated in the hands of men who are deeply insecure in their identity, the consequences ripple through every aspect of our world. Political instability, economic aggression, and reactionary social movements all stem from the unchecked egos of those desperately trying to prove themselves. The fear of losing status or control has turned into an all-out war against progress, empathy, and cooperation. The result? A world teetering on the brink of chaos.

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The Tech Titans and Their Insecurity

In recent years, we’ve seen an undeniable shift in how power is wielded by some of the most influential men in the world. The billionaire tech bros—Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, and Jeff Bezos—have gone full hyper-masculine. Musk and Zuckerberg literally challenged each other to an MMA-style fight. Zuckerberg has hit the gym and changed his hairstyle. Bezos has physically bulked up and acquired a trophy wife. These are classic examples of overcompensation, desperate attempts to prove and reaffirm their masculinity. But why? And what does it say about our culture?

The Performance of Masculinity

Our society has long held the notion that manhood must be proven through public displays of strength, dominance, or aggression. The problem with this performance-based masculinity is that it can also be lost through public humiliation. If a man is perceived as weak, incompetent, or submissive, he risks “losing his man card.” And when this happens, the reaction is often to double down on hyper-masculine behaviors to reclaim it. The loss of the perception of manhood leads to more risky behavior.

Donald Trump provides a perfect case study in this dynamic. His political playbook relies on bravado, aggression, and the perpetual performance of toughness. When challenged, he escalates—tariffs become trade wars, inflammatory rhetoric turns into threats of military action. The same pattern plays out among the tech elite, who, rather than focusing on innovation, have turned to performative masculinity as a form of power projection.

The Father Wound and the Insecurity of Modern Men

About 30 years ago, John Eldredge’s book Wild At Heart introduced the concept of the “father wound.” This was eye opening for me. The idea is that many men never had their masculinity affirmed by their fathers or another strong male figure, leading to deep-seated insecurity. Without that affirmation, some men seek external validation through dominance, aggression, and material success.

This wound manifests in predictable ways: bullying behavior, obsessive competition, and an inability to handle criticism. The tech titans of today—who were often socially awkward and ridiculed in their youth—seem to be making up for lost time, proving their manhood through wealth, physical strength, and control over vast digital empires. But their unchecked, unhealed wounds don’t just affect them—they shape the world.

Cultural Rituals of Manhood

Across the world, many cultures have formalized rites of passage that guide boys into manhood in a structured and meaningful way. These rituals provide a clear transition, affirming masculinity not through overcompensation but through meaningful challenges and communal recognition. Some examples include:

* The Sateré-Mawé Bullet Ant Glove (Amazon Rainforest) – Young boys wear gloves filled with bullet ants, enduring extreme pain as a test of endurance and strength.

* The Hamar Bull Jumping (Ethiopia) – In this ritual, boys must leap over a line of bulls to prove they are ready for adulthood and marriage.

* Maasai Lion Hunt (Kenya and Tanzania, historically) – Traditionally, young Maasai warriors had to hunt and kill a lion to prove their bravery, though this has evolved due to conservation efforts.

* Bar Mitzvah (Jewish Tradition) – While not physically demanding, this religious ceremony marks a boy’s transition into manhood with spiritual and community recognition.

* Walkabout (Indigenous Australian Culture) – Some Aboriginal groups send boys into the wilderness alone for months to survive, symbolizing their transformation into men.

The Lack of Formal Rituals in the West

Western societies, particularly in the U.S., lack formalized rites of passage for boys to transition into manhood. Without structured rituals, boys are left to find their own ways to prove themselves, often through misguided or destructive means—gang initiation, reckless behavior, violent sports, or displays of wealth and dominance. Instead of communal support guiding them into maturity, many young men grow up with a void, constantly seeking ways to validate their masculinity.

This absence of initiation creates a cycle of insecurity, where men never truly feel “initiated” into adulthood. Many men in our culture live in constant fear that one slip risks them losing their manhood. They are little boys playing dress-up as men. Instead of a structured, meaningful challenge that proves their worth, they are left with toxic cultural signals—power, aggression, and domination as substitutes for true maturity.

"Real men" don't feel the need to prove their manhood. They are secure in their personhood without the need for constant external affirmation.

A World Out of Balance

For centuries, societies have been dominated by masculine energy—characterized by competition, hierarchy, and conquest. But in recent decades, we’ve seen the rise of feminine values: collaboration, empathy, and equity. This shift has been met with a fierce backlash, as men accustomed to being in control feel threatened by progress. The result? A desperate doubling down on outdated notions of masculinity.

This is why conservatives are outraged over DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion), CRT (Critical Race Theory), and “woke” culture. These movements represent a rebalancing of power that threatens the traditional male-dominated hierarchy. A necessary correction.

This correction has been seen as a threat. Rather than adapt, the response has been reactionary, turning these concepts into cultural boogeymen. People are actively trying to cancel “woke” culture. Harmless words have become taboo, even in scientific and academic papers.

The Contempt for the Feminine and the Threat of Gender Fluidity

Nothing reveals the insecurity of men more than the insults they use against each other. Gay and transgender rights threaten men insecure in their own sexuality. They feel threatened by the very existence of gender fluidity, as it challenges the rigid definitions of masculinity they cling to for validation. The worst things a boy or man can be called are words associated with femininity or queerness: pussy, c**t, fag, gay. These slurs aren’t just insults; they are expressions of contempt for anything perceived as weak, emotional, or vulnerable—traits traditionally associated with the feminine. This kind of thinking is not just toxic for men, but for society as a whole.

The War on Words: Controlling Language to Control Power

In recent years, certain words have been deliberately removed from official U.S. government documents, reflecting an attempt to suppress discussions on gender and social equity. For example, during the Trump administration, agencies like the CDC were reportedly instructed to avoid terms such as 'diversity,' 'transgender,' and 'vulnerable' in budget proposals (The Washington Post). Similarly, under new policies, federal agencies have purged references to 'gender' and 'equity' from reports and official communications, attempting to reshape language to fit ideological narratives (Reuters). This linguistic crackdown isn’t just about words—it’s a strategic effort to control public discourse, reinforcing traditional power structures by erasing the language necessary to challenge them.

How will we ever address the fact that women’s health doesn’t receive the attention that is needed if we can’t even use feminine pronouns when we’re trying to address the problem?

This war on language is another example of the deep insecurity driving the backlash against progress, as those in power attempt to control not just policy but the very terms of discussion.

The Need for Balance: Masculine and Feminine Energies in Individuals and Society

Masculine and feminine energies have traditionally been associated with certain genders, but to be well-adjusted human beings, we need a balance of both. Masculine energy, characterized by assertiveness, ambition, and logic, must complement feminine energy—empathy, collaboration, and intuition. This balance is necessary for both individuals and societies as a whole.

Women seeking success in male-dominated fields often feel pressured to emulate masculine behaviors. In politics, corporate leadership, and even sports, many women adopt aggressive, competitive, and emotionally detached personas to be taken seriously. This is not an inherent flaw in women but rather a reflection of a system that rewards hyper-masculinity while dismissing traits associated with femininity as weaknesses. The consequence is a reinforcement of imbalance, where power is still tied to aggression and dominance rather than wisdom and cooperation.

For true progress, we must shift our cultural understanding of leadership and strength. The most effective leaders—regardless of gender—integrate both energies, wielding confidence without arrogance and making decisive choices while valuing emotional intelligence. Societies that embrace this balance create more just and sustainable environments, fostering innovation, cooperation, and well-being.

The truth is, true maturity and strength come from integrating both masculine and feminine energies. We must redefine masculinity, not as dominance or aggression, but as a balanced and secure presence that embraces vulnerability, compassion, and collaboration. Societies, too, require both forces to create systems that are effective and fair.

The Challenge For Men

The challenge now is to recognize and actively work to correct this imbalance. Men don’t need to prove their masculinity through wealth, aggression, or domination. True strength comes from wholeness—embracing both the masculine's drive and the feminine's compassion. To move forward, we must foster new rites of passage—ones that teach young men resilience, emotional intelligence, and a sense of responsibility to others. Instead of clinging to outdated notions of power, we must encourage men to lead with wisdom and integrity. Only then can we build a world where strength is measured not by control, but by character, and where balance—not bravado—defines what it means to be a man. This is important for our health both as individuals and as a society. In fact, as we lurch from culture wars to trade wars, we are perilously close to actual shooting wars. Getting the balance right may be necessary for our very survival.

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