Awhina Matthews-Egnot has lived multiple lives in one — personal training for 15 years, binge eating, bodybuilding, grief, identity collapse, becoming a single mom, losing her mother, and rebuilding a life that actually feels like hers.

This episode isn’t “high vibe.”
It’s real. It’s nervous system truth. It’s the kind of self-love that’s earned through radical responsibility — the kind that lands in the body, not just your notes app.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing all the “right” things…
but your body still feels unsafe…
or you keep defaulting to control, over-functioning, or self-sabotage…
this conversation will hit.

Welcome to Level Up with Rachel — with breathwork facilitator, retreat creator, and community builder Awhina.

In this episode we get into:

How grief shows up as control, food, overtraining, and “being fine”

The moment Awhina realized her “discipline” was actually self-destruction

Why breathwork works when talking doesn’t (somatic healing, no performance)

Rebuilding identity after motherhood, loss, and separation

Feminine flow + masculine structure (without the internet’s weird extremes)

The real meaning of self-love: safety, action, and self-trust

If you’ve been craving a deeper conversation about healing — not the aesthetic version — this one will feel like a homecoming.

Chapters

00:00 Intro
01:05 Meet Awhina + her mission
02:08 Personal training, binge eating, body image + self-hate
03:23 The moment it clicked: “This isn’t normal”
04:05 NLP + childhood roots of the “void”
06:58 The first pivotal moment: losing her brother
09:02 Disconnection, coping, and pain stored in the body
11:40 Identity collapse: pregnancy + leaving the gym world
13:45 Losing her mom + rebuilding from the ashes
16:07 Separation + the deeper layer of healing
18:39 Surf retreats + HeartLED Collective
21:16 Self-love now: inner child work + taking action
25:25 Seasons, devotion, and going “all in”
27:07 Feminine/masculine balance in real life
35:54 Single mom life, friendships, and capacity
47:13 Safety, receiving support, and creating a new reality
50:15 Pushing through fear: the “waterfall” metaphor
54:20 Meaning of life

Connect with Awhina:
Website: https://www.awhinamatthewsegnot.com/
Instagram: @awhinamatthewsegnot
Surf Retreats IG: Surf and Soul Adventures
Community: HeartLED Collective
(If you’re in Christchurch — go be in the room. Your nervous system will thank you.)

Work & Connect with Rachel
Explore Self Love Society membership, 1:1 Mentorship + ways to go deeper: www.levelupwithrachel.com
Instagram & Facebook : @levelup_with_rachel

If this landed, don’t just binge it, integrate it.
Subscribe, comment what hit the hardest, and share this with the woman who’s been “holding it together” while quietly falling apart.

— Rachel

Josh Townshend has lived an entire lifetime before 30 — addiction, prison, infidelity, heartbreak, ADHD, and the collapse of every identity he built to survive.
What happens when a man with that past becomes the one teaching men about attachment, self-worth, and healthy love?

If you’ve ever wondered why you attract emotionally unavailable partners… why self-awareness alone doesn’t change your patterns… or why love feels safe one minute and threatening the next — this conversation will land.

Welcome to Level Up with Rachel — featuring psychology student, men’s coach, and attachment storyteller Josh Townshend.

Two humans, same medicine: self-love that comes through radical responsibility and nervous system truth.

We get honest about:

• The self-destruction you don’t notice until everything falls apart
• Avoidant attachment disguised as “I’m fine”
• Why vulnerability feels like a threat to the nervous system
• The moment your body decides you can’t outrun yourself anymore
  
  

And we go deeper into how ADHD, addiction, attachment trauma, and brutal self-honesty can open the door to true change — not the performative kind, the embodied kind.

Inside this episode, we explore:

*ADHD, addiction, and self-medicating from age 13
*When hyperfixation becomes a career in the drug world
*Heartbreak, infidelity, and relational sabotage
*Attachment styles in real life: anxious, avoidant, disorganized
*Male victims of abuse — the stories society often ignores
*Why owning your darkest truths creates the deepest healing
*Generational trauma and nervous system wiring
*Disorganized attachment: the push-pull that feels like love but isn’t safety
*Emotional vs physical safety — and when it’s time to walk away
*Healthy vs unhealthy anger, and how to regulate instead of react
*What healthy relationship dynamics actually look like

If you’ve ever loved someone who couldn’t love you all the way…
If you’ve done “the work” but still lose yourself in relationships…
If you’re ready to understand your patterns — and the men you choose — through a deeper psychological and somatic lens…

This episode will feel like someone finally turned the lights on.

If this landed, don’t just binge it — integrate it.
Subscribe for more grounded conversations on self-love, nervous system healing, feminine leadership & embodiment, and emotionally healthy relationships.
Comment what resonated most.
Share this with someone who needs to hear a man speak honestly about accountability, attachment, and change.

Connect with Josh Townshend:
Podcasts: ‪@thesocialwildlife‬ and The Love and War Podcast 

Instagram: @townshendjosh + @thesocialwildlife + @theloveandwarpod
Facebook:   / townshendjosh 
Website: www.townshendjosh.com

Work With Rachel:
Explore Freebies, Self Love Society Membership, & 1:1 Mentorship
Website: www.levelupwithrachel.com
Instagram: @levelup_with_rachel
Facebook:   / levelupwithrachel  

Cara did everything “right” and still felt disconnected.
If success hasn’t brought the fulfillment you thought it would… this conversation will land.

Welcome to Level Up with Rachel — featuring Identity Transformation Coach, author, and keynote speaker, Cara Calvin.

Two women, same medicine: self-love that lands in the body.

We get honest about:
- The hamster wheel of achievement
-Burnout that looks like “discipline”
-The terror of slowing down

And what happens when your body finally says “enough.”

We cover: nervous system regulation, numbing patterns, feminine/masculine polarity, releasing friendships, identity grief, and building a life that actually feels like yours.

If you’ve checked all the boxes yet still feel like something is missing or off, this one will hit home.
Regulate to receive. Let it be safe to soften and succeed.

In this episode:
*Corporate validation → rock bottom → realignment
*Numbing patterns (food, alcohol, scrolling, over-exercise) and how to unwind them
*The productivity = worthiness trap (and how to break it)
*Nervous system safety: discerning fear vs. expansion
*Feminine & masculine balance without the fluff
*Grieving old identities and friendships — with integrity
*Practical self-love: identity, values, tiny daily practices that compound
*Spiritual activation: intuition, breathwork, energy work, past-life insights

Who this is for: High-achieving, hyper-independent women who want depth, intimacy, and ease without losing their edge. Women who know they can’t keep powering through.
Women who feel everything but rarely allow themselves to feel with themselves.
Women who are ready to be held, nourished, and feeling alive in their body again.

If this served you, send it to a woman who also needs to hear it.
Like, comment, and subscribe for more conversations on nervous system wealth, feminine leadership, and relationships that make your life bigger.

Connect with Cara
Instagram: @cara.calvin @meon.nz @leadersinthelight
Website: meon.co.nz

Connect with Rachel
Instagram: levelup_with_rachel
Website: levelupwithrachel.com

✨ Work With Rachel

If you’re a high-achieving woman who’s done “the work” but still feels disconnected from yourself, your body, or your relationships — this is your invitation to go deeper.

→ Self Love Society: The membership for women ready to soften, receive, and reconnect to themselves in a real, embodied way.
Join here: Self Love Society

→ 1:1 Mentorship: For the woman who is ready to step into her next identity while staying grounded in her body, relationships, and truth.
Apply by clicking HERE

In this podcast episode, Serena Rose from @spiritualsexcoach on Instagram and Rachel from @levelupwithrachel on Instagram dive more into their personal experiences with different relationship dynamics, healing that's available in healthy relationships that you can't access in solitude, growth from choosing yourself, and navigating how to integrate what you learn.

Serena shares her inspiring golden nugget she's never shared before on what's been the best thing to come from divorce. 

Rachel shares the best thing she learned and what she feels is the deep underlying disconnect from women being able to fully surrender into their feminine energy. 

Then they dive into learning the difference of intuition and fear. 

How deep, healthy sisterhood friendships are not only life changing but are the key in learning how to have healthy relationships on a romantic level.

Rachel gets emotional when sharing about how grateful she is for being able to hold and receive healthy sisterhood relationships. How one of her passions is to help every women on their journey to love themselves deeply in order to experience this level of deep love from others. 

Serena shares how she navigated her recent break up and breaks down the differences of conflict based & solution based styles. They continue to dive into the nitty gritty of communication and why its crucial in any relationship.  They also go into what different trauma responses are and how they can show up in relationships. Which leads them into talking about how all this is tied to the intimacy connection in relationships. 

Finally Serena and Rachel dive into how being single can be a really sacred time for not just healing but exploration of yourself on a deeper level.

Follow Serena Rose on Instagram 

Read more about Serena and how to work with her by clicking here. 

Read more about Rachel here

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Guest speaker Rachel Small from @raise.withrachel shares her journey of self love starting from the age of 14. Rachel Small desires to bring an awareness to different aspects and variable points when it comes to the depths of personal development.

Follow Rachel Small on Instagram 

Read more about guest speaker, Rachel Small and how to work with her here

Read more about Rachel here

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Serena and Rachel dive into their personal experiences with relationships, emphasizing healing, growth, and navigating emotional challenges. Serena, having recently entered a new relationship after divorce, shares her journey of moving through the honeymoon phase, confronting triggers reminiscent of her past relationship, and learning to communicate more effectively with her partner. 

Rachel, meanwhile, is in a relationship where she’s been triggered to revisit past wounds. Her partner’s patience and insight have helped her understand her healing needs and work through emotional challenges. Both women acknowledge the significance of self-reflection and identifying personal triggers as essential to building stronger relationships.

The conversation shifts to healing and growth, where both discuss vulnerability and trust in relationships. 

On the topic of conflict resolution, both women reflect on their strategies for handling disagreements. 

They further explore intimacy and communication, agreeing that conflicts, when approached with care, can build deeper intimacy and understanding between partners. 

Creating a safe space for emotions is another key theme. 

They emphasize teamwork, trust, and mutual support as foundational elements in relationships. They discuss the importance of understanding personal triggers, strengths, and weaknesses, and how working together as a team can overcome challenges. 

Personal growth and embracing emotional challenges are significant aspects of their conversation. Serena opens up about feeling overwhelmed during confrontations, and they both talk about how practice and repetition help in mastering new behaviors.  

They emphasize the importance of not judging behaviors solely based on personal experiences.

The episode concludes with a discussion about self-love and communication. Both women agree on the value of patience, understanding, and choosing oneself in relationships. They also reflect on how overcoming challenges deepens love and connection.

Follow Serena Rose on Instagram 

Read more about Serena and how to work with her by clicking here. 

Read more about Rachel here

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In this empowering episode of Reclaiming Your Power, we dive deep into the hidden struggle of high-achieving women—imposter syndrome—and explore how radical self-love is the key to breaking free.

You’ve worked hard, hit milestone after milestone, and yet, something still feels off. That nagging voice of doubt keeps whispering, “You’re not enough,” leaving you feeling like a fraud in your own success. But here’s the truth: your worth isn't tied to your achievements. It’s time to stop seeking validation outside of yourself and start embracing the inner knowing that you are already enough.

Join us as we unpack the connection between imposter syndrome and self-love, explore why so many driven women struggle with their self-worth, and provide practical steps to reclaim your power. Learn how to rewrite your story, break free from self-doubt, and live in alignment with your highest self—radiating confidence, fulfillment, and joy.

If you're ready to move from striving to thriving, this episode is for you. Plus, discover how Self Love Society can help you on this journey toward embracing your true worth and creating an extraordinary life from the inside out. 

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Work with people who genuinely care about your overall growth and well-being, rather than those who prioritize profit over personalized support.

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