Following in Kid Rock's carpetbagging cowboy boot steps, Uncle Kracker released his debut album featuring this banal, confusingly confident single about:

1. Heroin (duh you stupid idiot)
2. Adultery
3. Being Secretly Gay
4. Being Openly Very Cool

Also: a music video featuring characters fantasizing about better music, a Cracker with a stage performance like a tired sock, and an older woman in the comments section who tries to teach young boys the art of seduction.