Some people seem kind, caring, and thoughtful...but are they truly good, or just trying to look good? In Episode 16 ofThings We Say In Therapy, we dive into the difference between authentic goodness and performing kindness for appearances.

Learn about psychological concepts like moral licensing, cognitive dissonance, and shame avoidance, and discover how these behaviors show up in everyday life and relationships. I'll share some personal experiences, practical advice, and self-reflective questions to help you spot patterns in yourself and others, and move toward authentic growth and integrity.

Other key concepts you'll learn in this episode:

• Why some people become defensive and blame-shift when they’re held accountable, and what that reveals psychologically
• How moral licensing allows people to justify harmful behaviour while still seeing themselves as “good”
• How focusing on image can damage relationships
• Signs that someone prioritises reputation over emotional repair
• How to reflect on your own patterns without self-shaming
• Practical ways to move from image-management to integrity and emotional maturity

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