Lunch‑and‑learns promise community and growth, then quietly convert your weekend prep into unpaid teaching hours and a slide deck someone else will GTM. In this ten‑minute monologue Dr Disruptor performs a forensic audit of the ritual: what an honest knowledge‑share should deliver (scalable learning, documented outputs, recognized effort) versus what it often extracts (prep work, invisible labor, and applause without credit). The Survivor supplies empathy‑first, immediately usable tactics: three diagnostic signals that a session will be exploitative; a triage flow to choose Accept + Recorded Deliverable, Negotiate Credit or Budget, or Decline + Package; and three paste‑ready scripts (friendly, neutral, assertive) to set expectations before you open PowerPoint. Listeners leave with a two‑week 'Knowledge‑Share Repair' pilot they can run (record one session, collect usage metrics, or secure a speaker stipend) and a CTA to visit the show site to download the 'Lunch‑Learn Repair Kit' one‑pager with templates and an invite blurb. May your coffee be stronger than your mission statement.