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"The autopsy report attributes his death to acute PCP intoxication and physical exertion during the struggle with officers. That's an interesting finding. So, lunch buddies, this was, well, an abomination. The murder of Pastor Kirk was senseless. The church was defiled by violence. Witnesses were traumatized, and we were reminded that there really are no safe spaces. Come back for more lunchtime crime. We have a few more unlikely but true tales for you to chew on all week."