On this episode I speak with Luther, a black man navigating the ups and downs of the sex positive communities with a specific focus on his experiences with race play, the effects it has had on his identity, feelings of self-worth, and notions of being accepted as a person as opposed to a fetish.

Luther talks about his introduction to the sex positive communities, having been taken to a swingers resort in Cancun, where his first experiences of being a bull for couples began. He opens up about his darker experiences thereafter where some couples began engaging him in nonconsensual race play, dropping the n-bomb on him during sex, fetishizing and tokenizing him, leaving him feeling ultimately degraded. Luther discusses the complex feelings of being disempowered and used as a dispensable and replaceable fetish object during vulnerable moments of intimacy. He examines how racism has disrupted his sense of identity as a person, and his attempts to regain his identity through interactions with good people, good experiences, and explorations of pleasure in the sex positive communities.

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