9. No stranger to confession, repentance and loving confrontation. Freedom is a high value, not only for themselves, but also for those around them. Does not practice denial. 

B. How to do Confession

7 A’s of Confession:

1. Address everyone involved and only them. Talk to them about my faults. Do it right away and be persistent. Only talk to people who are part of the problem or part of the solution.

2. Avoid “if”, “but”, “maybe”. That’s just blaming the other party and finding fault with them for my own failure. “If I offended you”, “Maybe I was wrong”, “If you hadn’t said that”, “I’m sorry, but you..”

3. Admit specifically what you did, when possible.

4. Apologize – express your sorrow for your sin

5. Ask for forgiveness. Most people leave this out. The other party might be 99% wrong, but this isn’t about them right now. It’s about your own log.

6. Accept the consequences. Make restitution. It’s what you ought to do. Don’t demand that they pretend nothing happened.

7. Alter your behavior. You won’t be perfect, but you’ll get better. Repent before God (Robert Williams).

Transition: The difference between confession and repentance see this article - https://www.9marks.org/article/confessionrepentance/

3. Repentance

A. Definition of Repentance - The heart change and transition

B. Example of Repentance - Psalm 51:1-19 - King David’s repentance. Principle: “Your repentance must become more notorious than your sin.”

C. Benefits of Repentance

B. How to Loving Confrontation

1.  Define the problem.

a.  Ask these questions:

i.  What are you confronting him about?

ii.  What did he do or say?

iii.  What sin is involved?

iv.  What is the impact?

v.  How does he need to change?

b.  Define the thing biblically- it is Scripture, not our own thoughts, that are useful for rebuking and correction (II Timothy 3:16-17).

2.  Get the log out of your own eye (See Matthew 7:1-5).

·  Be aware of your own sins and temptations (Galatians 6:1).

3.  Prepare your heart.

a.  Make sure your motives are right- to glorify God, turn your brother or sister from sin, and be reconciled.  (NOT TO WIN YOUR CASE STRAIGHTEN THEM OUT, PUT THEM IN THEIR PLACE, OR RELIVE YOUR IRRITATION).

b.  Make sure your attitudes are right- attitudes of gentleness, patience, humility, and genuine concern for the welfare of others.

c.  Make sure your content is good- (Do not gather ammunition and do a rapid fire on the person you are confronting).

d.  Pray for effectiveness in communicating your concerns.

RESPONDING TO CONFRONTATION

1.  Listen humbly and prayerfully.

2.  Confess.

3.  Ask for forgiveness.

4.  Thank and affirm.

Responding to Confession

1.  Tell the person you forgive him/her.  (Don’t say “It’s OK” or “Don’t worry about it”)- Sin is never OK!

2.  Thank the one seeking forgiveness for coming and confessing.

3.  Ask if he has any offense toward you as a result of the incident.

a.  If applicable, confess.

4.  Declare the episode over- dead and gone!

a.  Express your intent to walk fully reconciled to the person.

Nugget:  Many blush to confess their faults, who never blush to commit them. William Secker