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If I have harmed anyone, knowingly or unknowingly, through my own confusions, I ask their forgiveness. If there's any who has harmed me, knowingly or unknowingly, through their confusions, I forgive them. And if there is a situation I am not yet ready to forgive, I forgive myself for that. All the ways I doubt, judge, belittle and be unkind to myself, through my own confusions, I forgive myself. 

These lines are a buddhist prayer of forgiveness. i appreciate it so much because

We all struggle to forgive for different reasons. Sometimes its from a place a pride, we feel the only power we hold over a person or situation that has harmed us is to not forgive them. And then we build actions and mindsets that keep us bound to from that oath we take with ourselves to not forgive, to not give another ounce of power away. It can look like holing grudges and resentment. 

We probably all have a time we’ve chosen to not forgive another person - something small or major - but the truth is, when we choose to hold onto harm by not forgiving we are internalizing the pain they inflicted on us. when we internalize the pain, when we think we are being strong or powerful, that pain builds within us and has long reaching impacts. we can become jaded, judgmental, and sometimes petty ourselves. we hold onto the pain inflicted on us and it roots itself deeply within us to the point that it cannot be let go.

Sometimes its toward ourselves. we make mistakes, or from a time in life when we were struggling to know our worth, value, and importance, we lashed out or acted through deceit or anger or even violence which imposed harm on another. And sometimes we cause harm to ourselves in a more subtle yet still powerful way. and that is through the relationship we have with ourselves. right now, ask yourself, how do I speak to myself about my physical body? Can you start to tell me the things about your physical body you dislike and wish were different? what are they?

do you speak to yourself, think to yourself, or act towards yourself in ways that further highlights what you don’t like abut yourself. if you stand in the mirror daily criticizing the fact that you have curves, or the way your eyes are spaced, things that are inherent to you, you are causing har.

If you know me and listen to this podcast, i don’t promote or encourage ignoring what causes you pain and pretending everything is fine, so i’m not here to tel yourself to suddenly start loving everything about you.

Rather, I invite you to become aware of the ways you may be inflicting harm on yourself in the subtle ways.