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Memorial Day is specifically for honoring military personnel who died in service to the country, not to be confused with Veterans Day which honors all who have served. I share my personal experience as a military widow and why the common phrase "Happy Memorial Day" is deeply painful for those who have lost loved ones in service.

• Memorial Day falls on the last Monday in May and is a day to mourn and honor deceased service members
• Many people incorrectly conflate Memorial Day with Veterans Day (in November)
• The confusion between these holidays can be harmful to Gold Star families who are grieving
• Now approaching my 17th Memorial Day since losing my husband
• Self-care strategies for managing grief during triggering holidays include allowing yourself to feel emotions
• Practical self-care can include simple productivity, maintaining hygiene, and seeking professional support
• Consider reaching out with a simple message to Gold Star families, understanding they may not respond

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