Not Like Me

Men as Allies? When Leadership Gets Uncomfortable with Dr. Brad Johnson


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Most men believe they are supporting women at work.

In fact, studies show about 60% of men think they are strong allies.


But only about 30% of women agree.

Now I don’t know about you, but to me, that is not a small gap we should be brushing over.
To me, that is a major leadership problem.

Thankfully, it’s also a problem for others, like my friend Dr. Brad Johnson - who’s doing something about it. In this episode of Not Like Me, I sit down with Dr. Brad to talk about what it actually looks like for men to show up as allies for women in the workplace.

Because support is easy when nothing is happening.
It gets real when a woman gets interrupted…
When her idea gets repeated and credited to someone else…
Or when something is said that makes the room go quiet.

And here is what the research shows:

  • Men are significantly more likely to speak in meetings and less likely to be interrupted
  • Women are interrupted more often and have their ideas overlooked or  hijacked
  • And in those moments… most people notice, but very few step in

So the question is not “Do you care?”

It is: “What do you actually do about it?”

Not in theory.
Not in a company required training.
But in the real-time moments where it counts.

Brad and I get into:

  • Why so many well-intentioned men believe they are showing up… and where that breaks down
  • What the data actually says about who gets heard, who gets interrupted, and who actually gets credit
  • What is happening in your brain in that split-second hesitation and why silence is the default
  • How to step in without making it awkward, performative, or about you
  • The difference between being a “good guy” and being a leader your team actually trusts

We talk about why men stepping up as allies is not all unicorns and rainbows. It’s uncomfortable. Nobody wants to be “that guy.” But we both know that you do not get judged by what you intend to do. You get judged by what you actually do.

And saying nothing is still a decision.

Brad brings the research.
I bring what I actually see happening in these rooms.

And if it makes you a little uncomfortable, good. That usually means we are getting somewhere.

If you want to go deeper, Dr. Brad Johnson’s book The Fair Share is a strong next step. It comes out June 30th.

Pre-order it HERE.

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Not Like MeBy Stephanie Chung