S3 Ep 129: The first scream movie without Wes Craven. This one isn't a total miss for me, but there are some huge holes that could have easily been covered up.

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S3 Ep 128: It's like the movie Elf plus the movie Leprechaun in the hood. Except, way shittier and nothing like either of those movies.

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Elf in the Hood is a Christmas-set horror film about a struggling couple, Malik and Jada, who are deep in debt to a dangerous drug dealer. In a desperate attempt to make quick cash, they come across a mysterious elf-shaped voodoo doll they think could be valuable. But when they try to sell it, they accidentally awaken a vengeful supernatural force. What was supposed to be a payday turns into a terrifying Christmas Eve survival nightmare as the malevolent entity hunts them through the night.

S3 Ep127: I forgot to mention that this barely counts as a Christmas movie. I feel like I got tricked. Also, the other thing that makes this movie worse than the last house on the left is that the revenge part of it is very short and not really satisfying in the way that you want it to be. Because it's a movie, you're kind of expecting some sort of bizarre justice. But, that's not really the case here. Anyway, click my links below.

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Late Night Trains (1975), also known as Night Train Murders, is a grim Italian exploitation thriller directed by Aldo Lado.

The film follows two teenage girls, Lisa and Margaret, who are traveling by train from Germany to Italy for Christmas. During the overnight journey, they encounter a group of violent, unstable criminals who befriend them and gradually reveal their true nature. What begins as an uneasy ride turns into a prolonged ordeal of psychological cruelty and brutal violence, much of it taking place inside the confined space of the train.

After the criminals leave the train, the film shifts focus to Lisa’s parents, who unknowingly give shelter to the perpetrators. When the truth comes out, the story transforms from a survival nightmare into a cold, methodical revenge tale, with the parents exacting punishment in a detached, almost procedural way.

Stylistically, Late Night Trains is known for its bleak tone, disturbing realism, and social commentary beneath the exploitation surface. It reflects 1970s European anxieties about youth alienation, random violence, and the fragility of civility. Often compared to Last House on the Left and A Clockwork Orange, the film is controversial, brutal, and intentionally uncomfortable—designed less to entertain than to unsettle.

S3 Ep126: I wonder why the elf puppet was so stinky... I hope someone wasn't doing something they weren't supposed to be doing to the elf puppet on set. Anyway, this movie is way better than it has any right to be. Sign up for my Patreon for bonus episodes and to help me buy a bc rich.

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Elves (1989) is a low-budget Christmas-horror exploitation film that follows Kirsten, a teenager who accidentally awakens an ancient Nazi-created elf during an anti-Christmas ritual gone wrong. The creature is part of a bizarre Nazi plot to breed a “master race” by forcing Kirsten—revealed to be the product of a twisted eugenics experiment—to mate with the elf.

A down-on-his-luck ex-cop turned mall Santa, Mike McGavin, teams up with her to stop the creature and the group of surviving Nazis trying to complete the plan. The movie mixes occult horror, holiday camp, and outlandish conspiracy elements, ultimately delivering a chaotic, grimy, and surprisingly mean-spirited Christmas shocker.

S3 Ep 125: It's time for our Christmas episodes! We're starting off at a low point with "Silent Night, Deadly Night 3: Better Watch Out!" This movie is so dull and so poorly written. It comes nowhere near, "So bad, it's good," territory. It is a chore to get through. Anyway... I hope you enjoy the episode. I did just find out that this movie was released directly to video and or television.

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Silent Night, Deadly Night 3 picks up after the events of part 2, bringing back the franchise’s Santa-suited killer Ricky Caldwell—now comatose, badly injured, and sporting a clear dome brain apparatus that looks like a repurposed fishbowl glued to his skull. A doctor is trying to study Ricky using a young blind clairvoyant named Laura Anderson, hoping her ESP ability will connect to his dormant mind.

Of course… it does.

During a dream experiment, Laura unintentionally awakens Ricky, who bolts from the hospital, murders anyone in his way, and heads toward the place Laura is spending Christmas: her grandmother’s house. The second half of the film plays out like a road-trip slasher, as Laura, her brother, and his girlfriend find themselves stalked in a remote rural home on Christmas Eve.

The climax pits Laura—who uses her second sight instead of her literal sight—against Ricky in a tense, slow-burn showdown. Police eventually intervene, and Ricky is seemingly “killed”… again.

BONUS EPISODE: WHOA! This one doesn't even count as a numbered episode and it's free. That's pretty cool. If you check out my recommendations, please let me know. Okay? I don't wanna be sitting around wondering, "hmm, did those fuck faces watch any of the damn movies I offered them." Okay? It just takes a few seconds to put a little comment about it.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

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S3 Ep 124: If you have to argue about politics during the holidays, you might as well do it over something that's fun to talk about. I wanted to do something a little more structured with this one. If you enjoy it and would like to hear more thematic deep dives, let me know. Political or not. I hope everyone has a safe and happy thanksgiving.

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S3 Ep 123: If Michael Mann had his way, we'd still be watching The Keep. Rumor has it that the original run time was 69 hours long. Then cut down to 3 and a half hours. Then 2 hours and so on. Sign up for my patreon. New twin peaks episodes coming soon and a review of the ultimate evil.

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S3 Ep 122: Welcome to MannVember. We're starting out with the film adaptation of Red Dragon. I also talk about another book adaptation that did not turn out so well. Be sure to sign up for my patreon for bonus episodes.

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S3 Ep 121: THE GOAT SCREAM SEQUEL... I don't think Scream 7 can take the belt, but we'll see.

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