Miixed: Conversations About Chronic Illness and Relationships

A mixed-ability couple coming up on 11 years of marriage share the exact systems they build so chronic illness doesn't break their relationship. Madelyn lives with multiple chronic illnesses — including hashimoto's, Celiac, and hEDS — while raising three kids with her husband Denham, and together they've turned their mixed-ability relationship into a life that works for both of them.

In this episode, you'll hear how they stopped chasing big dreams that no longer fit and scaled them down into something better: a paid off mortgage plan, chickens, a berry patch, and a life where everything in it is there because they chose it. Madelyn shares the monthly financial audit and weekly self-review that keep their decisions pre-made instead of decided in the moment, and the practice of saying no that she had to learn on purpose. Denham — the well partner — opens up about the year. he wasn't handling it well, the healthy thought patterns that pulled him out, and why the Golden rule isn't enough( he makes the case for the Platinum rule instead).

We also get into the hard stuff: preventing resentment from piling up in an inner enabled relationship, what Madelyn calls the invisible disability tax, the trust that lets her rest without guilt, and the one change they made to their kids' bedtime that gave their marriage its time back.

whether you're the chronically, ill partner, the well partner, or you love someone navigating chronic illness, this conversation is full of tools. you can use — value, filters, life, audits, and systems that hold a family together when energy is limited.

Follow The Miixed Podcast on Spotify, Apple podcasts, and YouTube. And remember: love the person, not the plan.

What if resentment is quietly building in your relationship

-- and neither of you is talking about it?

In mixed-ability relationships, chronic illness can leave both partners exhausted, guilty, or afraid to admit what they need. Licensed professional counselor Rachel Ayers joins Kodi to unpack resentment in relationships, caregiver burnout, invisible labor, and the unspoken expectations that can drive couples apart.

Learn how to recognize the difference between burnout and resentment, communicate your needs, and build a stronger marriage or partnership when chronic illness changes what's possible. Plus, discover why it's time to stop "shoulding" all over yourself.

Because it's not you against your partner. It's both of you against the illness.

Disclaimer: This account is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Engaging with this account is not therapy, and nothing stated here should be taken as professional advice or as a replacement for therapy. Content here may or may not apply to you.

Resentment is the emotion that can quietly destroy a relationship - so we asked the difficult questions live and discovered a lot.

In this mini episode, Kenyon shares a resentment he's never told me ( it involves Florida, and it wasn't the vacation), and I share the one I wrestle with every time I watch him work out - the body I used to have, and the workouts we used to do together.

We also get into the taboo stuff: the guilt of having needs when your partner's needs feel bigger, why the well partner stops asking for a back scratch, and what it feels like to say "I've got it" when you really don't. Kenyon's answer about not feeling like an equal partner stopped me in my tracks - I'd never heard it that way in 10 years of marriage.

If you're the sick partner or the well partner, this one's for both of you. And if resentment is building in your relationship, consider this your permission slip to start the conversation tonight.

New episodes every Saturday. Follow Miixed so you don't miss the next one.

Love the person, not the plan.

When chronic illness changes a relationship overnight, how do you find a way forward together? Jillian and Ryan share how they're rebuilding their life as a couple while navigating new symptoms, uncertain diagnoses, and shifting roles.

Jillian opens up about the grief of losing parts of the life she knew, the challenge of adjusting to new limits, and the importance of feeling heard by medical professionals. Ryan reflects on becoming a caregiver as well as a partner, facing uncertainty, and learning to make room for his own needs, too.

Together, they talk about the pressure of wedding planning when the future feels unclear, the "Doom Castle" of worst-case-scenario thinking, and the small rituals that help them stay connected - including laughter, video games, and at-home dates. They also share how they're learning to adapt, communicate, and build a new relationship together, one day at a time.

An honest conversation for anyone navigating chronic illness, a mixed-ability relationship, or a life that no longer follows the original plan.

Grief is a powerful emotion, often tangled with our expectations and dreams. In this mini-episode, Kodi and Kenyon share their heartfelt perspectives on what it means to grieve in a mixed-ability relationship.

Kenyon opens up about the grief over the life he envisioned before chronic illness changed their trajectory.

"I think I've grieved ...the life that I wish...I may have otherwise had".

Kodi adds another layer to this discussion by addressing the dreams they've had to let go of.

"I think I've grieved...the hope and the dream to do it . Dreaming about it makes it worse."

They're candid dialogue showcases the complexity of navigating relationships amid chronic illness, reminding listeners that they are not alone in their struggles..

As Kodi and Kenyon open up about their experiences, they offer a comforting message: It's possible to find joy and gratitude, even in the midst of grief.

If you resonate with their story or seek solace and shared experiences, tune into the full episode for an intimate exploration of love, loss, and resilience.

Chronic illness can turn a marriage into a minefield of grief, guilt, and last-minute cancellations - But it does not have to turn partners into opponents. Therapist Eli Weinstein shares the dialogue to help couples stay on the same team while navigating chronic illness.

Eli discusses his experience with Crohn's flares, hospital visits, and building a relationship around unpredictable symptoms, along with the fertility journey he and his wife faced through PCOS and IVF. He explains why sympathy can be more helpful than forced empathy, how to talk about grief without blame, and how expectations, perceptions, and reality shape conflict.

This episode offers practical language for both partners to help reduce resentment and find your way back to working as a team.

key words: chronic illness, Crohn's disease, PCOS, IVF, infertility, invisible illness, caregiving, partner support, chronic illness, grief, couples communication, marriage, relationship advice, emotional labor, sympathy, empathy, chronic pain, mental health, resilience.

When chronic illness and sudden disability changed everything, Kodi and Kenyon share how they navigated identity, love, and an unexpected new reality together. A short, honest conversation about resilience, relationships, and remembering that your value never disappears is found in this mini episode of The Miixed Podcast.

Trauma, chronic illness, and identity are deeply connected—and Monica Munson shares how small tools can help you reclaim your life. As a trauma-informed complementary therapist living with multiple chronic diagnoses, Monica opens up about the mindset shifts that can turn pain into purpose.

In this episode, you’ll hear practical ways to regulate your nervous system, process grief, and find joy in everyday moments. Monica also shares her path from interior designer to holistic healer, along with advice on how to choose practitioners who truly respect your limits and support your journey.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by change or unsure of who you’re becoming, this conversation offers compassionate guidance, resilience, and hope.

Join Alanna and Elliott as they share their journey through chronic illness and caregiving. Discover how their relationship and identities transformed through challenges like endometriosis and kidney stones, leading to deeper understanding and resilience. This episode offers practical insights on communication, community support, and turning adversity into strength. Perfect for anyone navigating health challenges in a relationship, this conversation is filled with hope and actionable advice. Plus some good laughs!

This episode and any episodes on this podcast are not meant to replace professional advice. This space is to bring together a community that helps us all feel less alone in our challenges and triumphs in mixed-ability relationships.

In this episode my husband and I talk about our personal experiences of navigating the tricky dynamics that come from merging families and how that has gone with our unusual mixed-ability relationship.

Topics include what support and understanding we hoped to have from family and friends (and what really happened), ways relationships have changed over the years while navigating illness, advice on how to approach family when they are discouraging your relationship, and more.