Welcome to our first mini-lab where we bring you three quick stories about ... well ... ballsy dumbasses. Why? Because ...

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Sources:
- https://247sports.com/Article/Shai-Werts-college-football-bird-poop-cocaine-arrest-Deputy-Charles-Browder-resigns-143321207/

- https://www.reuters.com/article/us-witchcraft/penis-theft-panic-hits-city-idUSN2319603620080423

- https://nypost.com/2017/06/14/man-who-robbed-bank-to-get-away-from-wife-sentence-to-home-confinement/