Since seeing Raiders of the Lost Ark, Gerry Porter has been inspired to search the globe for rare antiquities. Actually drums. He’s known Indiana Jones Minute’s Tom Taylor since birth, and Pete Mummert since their days at Marshall College, and believes that in a fight between Han Solo and Indiana Jones, we all win (until we all lose). When Gerry’s not shooting craps with the “bad egg” Hovitos, he’s installing Xboxes in every hut and slipping “Fortified Sunny D Jungle Punch with Pampas Berries” into every thatched lunch box. Here’s a joke he just made up: Why did the teacher make Gerry rewrite his number line? Bad Eights.

Nancy O’Kane, better known in Internet circles as “The Captain”, is much more comfortable watching movies than talking about them. Nevertheless, she has succumbed to the charms of her husband and agreed to take part in his podcast. When she’s not talking about George Kennedy and his cigars, she’s a full time student majoring in history and minoring in classics. She’s also busy being a caretaker to Rio, the most neurotic dog on the planet. Rio is afraid of thunder, lawnmowers, and plastic bags.

Joe Patroni is supervising the other ground crew, hammering lumber under the wheels of the stuck 707 on Runway Two Niner.

“Get it as close under the wheel as possible,” says Joe. “Then, give it a whack on the other side!”

Patroni hears the sound of trucks, and turns around. The plows of the Conga Line brake to a stop directly behind the 707. Joe spots the MelMobile, pulling up in front of the 707. He heads toward the station wagon.

Mel steps out of the