The word "selfish" has powerful women shaking in their boots and affecting our behaviour in profound ways. Examining the dictionary definition and our cultural conditioning reveals why women go to extremes to avoid being perceived as selfish, often at great cost to themselves.

• Women fear being called selfish so much that they neglect their own needs entirely
• Childhood conditioning taught girls to share, be quiet, and put others first
• Mixed messages told women they could "do anything" while still expecting self-sacrifice
• 1980s mothers modeled martyrdom while career women were labeled neglectful
• Current generation attempts to work like they don't have children and parent like they don't work
• Chronic overgiving leads to resentment when unreciprocated
• Running on empty makes us less effective in all roles
• We have inherited and weaponized this fear against ourselves

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