Not a silly improvised retelling this episode. Instead: it's my first proper short story of the podcast which I've written with a pen and everything! (Obviously I've read it aloud, otherwise we'd face a little problem). There's some outtakes at the end as well which I thought I'd throw in which includes one naughty word, hence the explicit language listing for the episode, but there's not really anything else explicit in the story so if you fall down weeping and shaking at anything stronger than the word "fiddlesticks" then perhaps switch me off after my outro finishes. There: You have been sufficiently warned so no fainting now you. Enjoy!

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