Neva Swartzendruber started an Instagram account to document her “fitness” journey, but it ended up as a documentation of her struggles with bulimia, body dysmorphia, and self-hate.

She hit a breaking point, decided to fight diet culture, accept her body, and love herself, and it has transformed her life. Today, she strives daily to be the woman she needed when she was younger, and to help others to embrace who they are, to love their bodies, to have freedom around food and to see that they are worth so much more than their external appearance.

Follow Neva's story on Instagram: @ditch__the__diet

Show notes

This is her first podcast (I'm honored) (1:30)

What is homemade potica? (2:13)

Bread, her favorite food that she avoided like the plague (3:43)

"Food morality," and how it's not that black and white (5:40)

The best way to eat Ezekiel bread (6:15)

Sourdough and bread making (7:24)

The Tartin Baker (7:57)

Getting into intense, obsessive phases (like brewing beer) (9:01)

Making health decisions from a negative space (10:03)

Avoidance can have the opposite effect (e.g., kids and alcohol) (11:30)

"Your motivation for making a choice has a big impact on your ability to stick with that choice" (12:34)

Growing up in a strict religious household and feeling unworthy (14:10)

The start of her eating disorder and achieving a sense of control (17:45)

The guilt and shame from eating and journaling to beat herself up (21:04)

The fear of gaining weight and parallels with addiction (23:48)

She would not eat out of spite, to have control (25:24)

The appeal of bulimia (27:51)

Being the unhappiest at her lowest weight... it's never enough (29:50)

"Reaching your weightless goals does not guarantee or ensure your happiness and your health" (31:28)

"What you get will never make you happy. Who you become will make you very happy or very sad." - Tony Robbins (33:45)

The impact of our stress about the food we eat (36:26)

The balance between obsession over health and throwing it all out the window (39:44)

Why she decided to "ditch the diet" (42:37)

Fueling change by focusing on the miserable aspects instead of glamorizing it (46:20)

How other women on social media helped her see another way to live (49:28)

The most important change for her recovery: stopping the negative self-talk (49:46)

The ideal diet (53:12)

What is "intuitive eating"? (56:38)

Finding the natural set point for her body and weight (1:02:52)

The most important part of recovery is addressing your mind (1:08:46)

Is a podcast in her future? (1:11:15)