In the span of three years, Danica Thomas went from girlfriend to caregiver to wife to widowed mother of two. The life she'd signed up for was gone, and she never expected her husband’s would end so soon. 

Allen, a two-time Purple Heart recipient, was critically injured in Afghanistan and forced to medically retire from the Army. Facing significant physical rehabilitation, a traumatic brain injury and PTSD, the Thomases renegotiated what the future would look like for their growing family. They navigated the VA's medical system, advocated for Allen's physical and mental health, and raised two girls along the way. 

Six years ago this month, Allen Thomas died by suicide; Danica is determined that his life will save thousands of others. She has now mourned him longer than she knew him, and works as board chair of the Susan M. Tillis Foundation to serve other military families in his memory. 

Whether you're facing single parenthood, the loss of a loved one, a mental health crisis or a life circumstance you didn't expect, Danica encourages you to lean on others and find strength you didn't know you had. (She promises it's in there.)

September is National Suicide Prevention Month; if you or a loved one need to talk, please call 1-800-273-8255.

Twenty-two veterans are lost to suicide each day. If you are or know a veteran in need of help, you can call the lifeline above and press 1 for counselors specific to military families; for virtual help, text 83825 or visit veteranscrisisline.net.

To connect with Danica, follow @danicasthomas on Instagram. 

Thanks for being here, y'all! I'd love your thoughts, questions, ideas, and everything in between. You can find me at @ButNotAllAtOnce on social media or ButNotAllAtOnce.com.

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