Guess what? Lots of women have lots to say about masturbation. All you have to do is ask. Politely and respectfully, of course! At least that’s what I did with this week’s guest: Nicole from the amazing Bitchface podcast. Clearly she’s thought about the topic a lot, which comes up in her writing as well as what she calls her ‘crush politics.’ While you consider drafting your own crush manifesto—and you should— here’s a start courtesy of my conversation with Nicole: get really sexy with yourself and indulge in your crush fantasy for all the potential that it holds, but not necessarily as a means to land your crush, which, as we all know is usually less fulfilling than fanning the flames. You know what they say, ‘It’s the journey, man!’