04.08.2022 - By Julie Hoverson
The Demon Beelzebud returns to pester sisters Rena and Matilda. [sequel to Force Majeure] Cast List Beelzebud - Anthony D.P. Mann (Horror Etc. Podcast) Rena - Julie Hoverson Matilda - Kate Waterous Jesse - Big Anklevitch (Dunesteef Audio Magazine) Infernique - Julia Carter Willial - Mark Olson Benedict - Reynaud LeBoeuf Mrs. Closky - Florida Possum Fat guy - Dave Fontenot Manager - Scott Spaulding Cameo appearance from Super Haunted Stories! Music by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Editing and Sound: Julie Hoverson Cover Design: Julie Hoverson Cover art includes: clear crystal / red crystal "What kind of a place is it? Why it's a modern family home, can't you tell?" ********************************************** Caveat Emptor Cast: Beelzebud Rena Matilda Jesse Infernique Willial Benedict Mrs. Closky Fat guy Manager OLIVIA Did you have any trouble finding it? What do you mean, what kind of a place is it? Why, it's a family home, can't you tell? MUSIC SOUND ALARM CLOCK GOES OFF, IS SLAPPED DOWN JESSE [waking up] maaaargh. SOUND PATTING BED JESSE Huh? [thick] Babe? [clears throat] Babe? [considering noise] Hmmm. SOUND BLANKET FLAPS JESSE What the hell time...? What? [yelling petulantly] Cassie? Who reset the alarm? SOUND STUMBLES INTO OTHER ROOM JESSE Cassie? Where's the laptop? Shit! We've been robbed! SOUND RUSHING AROUND SOUND DOORBELL JESSE Where's the phone? Gotta call police. SOUND DOORBELL JESSE Who the hell? SOUND DOOR OPENS ON CHAIN JESSE This is not a good time. BUD It's the only time you got, pal. JESSE I just got robbed. BUD No, you just got dumped. Read the note on the fridge. JESSE What? SOUND DOOR SLAMS, OUTSIDE WITH BUD BUD [WHISTLES SOMETHING] SOUND DOOR JERKS OPEN AGAIN JESSE [freaking out] Are you a friend of Cassie's? Do you know where she went? BUD Not my area. I just dropped by to give you a bit of a head's up. JESSE Uh-what? BUD I know you're feeling pretty low. Wife walked out, took the kid, and you don't know why-- JESSE We have a good life! BUD Yeah, it's got nothing to do with you moping around the house all day-- JESSE I got laid off. BUD Leaving all the housework for the little woman, so that when she gets home from her full day-- JESSE I have to spend my time looking for work-- BUD A lot of work in World of Warcraft, is there? Or are you considering a career in porn? JESSE None of your business! Besides...they're the only things that make me less depressed-- BUD Yeah, yeah, I've heard it all. So today is your lucky day - kinda. JESSE Kinda? BUD [dragged out, savoring] Ye-a-aah. MUSIC MATILDA It's $200. That's like three tanks of gas. RENA [disgusted sigh] I hate this work. MATILDA One hour plus drive time. Just think of it as gathering intel. RENA I'll think of it as whine tasting. SOUND PICKS UP KEYS, DOOR OPENS MATILDA Have fun! MUSIC SOUND DOORBELL, DOOR OPENS ON CHAIN RENA You called? JESSE Oh, yeah, this guy - he gave me your card. RENA And? JESSE And? RENA I didn't come all this way to stand on your porch, unpaid. MATILDA [mic] Confirmed. JESSE Oh, ah. Come in. SOUND UNCHAINS, OPENS DOOR JESSE Yeah, um, it's kind of a mess. You want a beer or something? RENA 57 minutes. JESSE What? RENA Of your hour. We confirmed your paypal transaction. JESSE Oh, right. My wife – she left me. RENA When? JESSE Oh, just this morning. RENA [disbelieving] Hmph. JESSE She's not much of a housekeeper. RENA I can smell that. JESSE That doesn't mean I don't want her back! SOUND POUNDING ON THE DOOR JESSE [angry sigh] Just a sec. RENA Take your time. MATILDA [mic] Cut the poor guy some slack. SOUND OPENS DOOR MRS. CLOSKY How dare you! JESSE How dare I, what? MRS. CLOSKY Bring a hooker into your house while your wife's away? MATILDA [mic] [laughing hysterically] RENA [low] Not funny. MATILDA [mic] I told you the black leather was wrong for the neighborhood! RENA Tough is tough. JESSE She's not-- MRS. CLOSKY I know just what kind of woman has the bleached blonde hair and the motorcycle. JESSE But Cassie-- MRS. CLOSKY That poor woman gave you two beautiful children, so any weight she's gained, well that's just as much your fault, isn’t it? MATILDA [mic] [fresh peals of laughter] RENA I'm gonna turn you off. JESSE But Mrs. Closky! MRS. CLOSKY You're just like my sonofabitch husband, and I just wish I had had someone like me to speak up on my behalf back when he-- SOUND DOOR SHUTS, cutting her off JESSE [sigh] Shit. RENA Sum up quick. I'm already bored. JESSE My wife left me this morning. I want to find out where she went. RENA Did you call her parents? JESSE Her mother won't answer. RENA Did you call her friends? JESSE They’re all on her side. RENA Did you check her emails? JESSE I didn’t think of that. RENA What have you done? JESSE I ... called you. RENA You understand that first $200 is only for this hour, the one we're currently wasting. JESSE Not for the entire job? RENA Not unless I find her in the next 47 minutes. JESSE [hopeful] Do you think you can? RENA What's her email address? MUSIC SOUND OUTSIDE, WALKING, LEATHER CREAKING MATILDA [mic] She already emailed back. Says he's been a shit since he got laid off. Says she told him she was going to do this, weeks ago, and he didn't even pay attention. RENA Hmph. Makes me want to run out and find one of my own. MATILDA [mic] [laughs] WILLY Uh, hello? RENA Not in a million years. WILLY I was just looking for a - ah! There's the address. SOUND HE HUSTLES OFF RENA Must be a friend of his-- MRS. CLOSKY [off, calling] You! RENA Oh hell. MRS. CLOSKY You, woman! MATILDA [mic] Uh-oh. RENA [sigh] What? MRS. CLOSKY How much do you charge? MATILDA [mic] Tell her you don't do lemon parties. RENA I don't-- [starts over] I am a bounty hunter. MRS. CLOSKY Oh! Well, that's a disappointment. RENA That I'm not a prostitute? MRS. CLOSKY I have a nephew. Unmarried. He could use a little cheering up. And his birthday's coming! MATILDA [mic] [teasing] We are a bit short on cash. RENA I - I have to go. Now. SOUND MOTORCYCLE REVS MUSIC AMB MATILDA'S DEN SOUND DOOR SHUTS (OFF) SOUND RENA ENTERS MATILDA [calling] So, how was the nephew? RENA [muffled] Funny. SOUND KNOCK ON DOOR RENA There wasn't any - oh. MATILDA What? RENA Who pops up out of nowhere on a regular basis? SOUND OPENS DOOR BUD Hiya doll! [louder] Dolls! RENA [to M] You okay with having him in? MATILDA Yeah, I guess. BUD Make a guy feel wanted, why dontcha? MATILDA We forgot to vacuum! RENA We're antisocial. BUD And here I thought it was just me. RENA You forgot to vacuum too? MATILDA Get over here, where I can see you! SOUND WALKING RENA Matilda. Bud. SOUND SHE FLOPS INTO CHAIR MATILDA You do look like Steve Buscemi. BUD I'm gonna take that as a compliment. You don't got no more places to sit? RENA One butt, one chair. Part of the recluse mystique. MATILDA There's a stool around somewhere... BUD eh. I can stand. Don't plan to be here that long. See, I gotta problem. MATILDA Another one? RENA We get $200 for the first hour. BUD Here. SOUND SLAPS DOWN MONEY BUD You know, I never woulda mistaken you for a prostitute. RENA Good to know. BUD Dominatrix, maybe. RENA [losing it] It's motorcycle gear! Not some kind of leather teddy and thigh high boots-- MATILDA [taunting] With stiletto heels? RENA Not helping! And those things'll break your ankles. [breath, recomposed] Clock starts now. What's your problem? BUD You girls are a hoot. You should take it on the road. MATILDA No thanks. RENA Tick...tock. BUD Fine. [sigh] You'd think the life of a demon like me would be a piece of cake. MATILDA From what you've said, you seem to have it all down to a system. BUD Yeah, well any well oiled machine can go Pfft - if you stick in the wrong cog. RENA What have you been sticking in your cogs? BUD [snicker] It's Infernique. MATILDA Sounds like a perfume. BUD The demon chick you fixed me up with. RENA Nuh-uh. No fixing. Just tricked her into giving in and going out with you. Once. Whatever happened after - not my fault. MATILDA Well, maybe just a little. BUD She's convinced she gotta class me up. RENA Class? You? BUD You don't need to make it sounds like such a joke, babe. MATILDA I wondered about the suit. Seemed awfully-- RENA Tasteful? MATILDA Restrained. I mean, the descriptions - you have such ... flair! [undertone] help me out here. RENA No. BUD Yeah, yeah, so I like the classics. This sharkskin still got its own kind of flash, but she's killing me with the pastels. [confidential] You know they come from the pit of despair? MATILDA Pastels? BUD Yeah. Not a pretty story. [up a bit] Anyway, I'm not so good at saying "no" to her, and she's been trying to get me to trade up. Better department. Better class of victim. MATILDA What will the comedians do without you? BUD Yeah, that's what I say, but there's always someone willing to take most any place, but my place is one of those ain't no one gonna fight over, see? RENA Nope. BUD This guy, Jesse - I gave him your card this morning - ring a bell? RENA The douche who didn't realize his wife was about to walk? BUD Yeah, well - that's what Infernique wants me for my new clientele. MATILDA The recently abandoned? The thoughtless husbands? RENA The douches? Plenty of them. You can have 'em. BUD Yeah, but she's got me sneaking around behind the back of Willy, the guy whose job it is now, undermining his numbers. Trying to make him look bad. Getting the douches to not sign. MATILDA All's fair in love and hell? BUD I dunno - I ain't liking this. RENA Talking people out of selling their souls? How abominable. BUD Nah, it's the backstabbing. Willy's - well not "good people" maybe, but he ain't a bad guy. Kind of a plodder. No inspiration. But he's got a sweet berth and he's ...competent. MATILDA You'll really miss the comedians, won't you? BUD [sighing admission] Yeah. RENA Easy. Tell her you don't want to change. BUD Why don’t you just point me at a good doctor, then, for when she rips me a new asshole. RENA Guess you're screwed. MATILDA Waitaminute. Look. the way I see it, you have two choices here. You can go ahead and be perfect, toe the line, do what she wants and be with her until she finds someone more ambitious-- RENA Won't be hard. MATILDA Shush. Or you find a way to slack off and subtly let her know that you aren't going to turn into a silk purse any time soon, and let her dump you. RENA Talk to that guy from this morning. I'm sure he can give you some pointers. MATILDA The big question is, is she worth it? BUD You know... You said a mouthful right there. I think some deep pondering is in order. Thanx! RENA You still have a few minutes left. BUD Ehh - Keep it! All us classy types tip! MUSIC RENA [snoring] SOUND PHONE RINGS, ANSWERED RENA [groggy] Hello? [a bit better] Hello? SOUND STRANGE BUZZ ON THE LINE RENA Shit. SOUND HANGS UP SOUND GRABBING CLOTHES, GUN SOUND EASES OPEN DOOR RENA [deliberately calms her breathing to listen] SOUND MUSIC PLAYS SOFTLY FROM MATILDA'S ROOM RENA [whispered] Shit. SOUND QUICK DASH SHUTS MAT's DOOR, MUSIC'S MUFFLED RENA [calming her breathing again] SOUND CREAK, ACROSS ROOM RENA [catch in her breathing, then careful] SOUND ANOTHER CREAK, ACROSS THE ROOM SOUND RENA CAREFULLY TAKES THE REMOTE SOUND CLICK, TV COMES ON, ACROSS ROOM BENEDICT [gasp] SOUND QUICK SCUFFLE OF MOVEMENT RENA [now behind him] You're gonna want to drop that. SOUND CLICK OF HER GUN CoCKED BENEDICT You don't know what you're doing. SOUND CLICK - TV OFF RENA I'm the one with the gun. And the remote. Whatever you got in your hand, drop it. SOUND SOMETHING CLATTERS TO THE FLOOR. SOUND MAT'S DOOR FLUNG OPEN MATILDA Hold it right there! RENA [up] Got 'im. [to him] Hands behind your back. BENEDICT [annoyed] Really? RENA Really. MATILDA Sorry I took so long. Couldn't find the night vision goggles. BENEDICT [sigh] Fine. SOUND HANDCUFFS ON BENEDICT IS this really necessary? RENA You're the one who broke in. MATILDA I’ll get the lights. RENA Goggles off. MATILDA I know! SOUND GOGGLES OFF, LIGHT SWITCH MATILDA Ooh! He’s smoking hot! Can we keep him? BENEDICT Let me explain. RENA Not much chance of that. Mat, 9-1-1, okay? MATILDA [playing it up] New where did I leave the phone? BENEDICT [blurted out] Where are you keeping the demon? RENA [surprised snort] MATILDA [giggles] Wow, dramatic much? RENA There’s a doghouse out back… MATILDA [fresh peal of laughter] BENEDICT This is no joke, lady. Harboring a demonic fugitive is very serious. RENA [growling now] “A” – harboring? Not a chance. “B” - fugitive? BENEDICT Beelzebud, lower echelon romalpa class signatory demon. He stands accused of contractual misconduct. RENA Let me guess – that’s bad. BENEDICT It’s a termination-class penalty. MATILDA Oh, shit! RENA Tell us more. BENEDICT No. MATILDA Oh, come on. You hunt demons. Do you make a good living at that? BENEDICT [bursts out laughing] RENA Guess that's a no. BENEDICT It's a calling, not a job. RENA So... you're a demon too. BENEDICT I'm not telling you anything. RENA You broke into our house. Convince us that we shouldn't call the real-life police. BENEDICT I wasn't going to do anything to you - just put this crystal somewhere-- RENA This thing? BENEDICT Yeah. It's a--[shuts up] MATILDA Might as well finish the sentence. [beat] How about strip guesses? BENEDICT What? RENA If she guesses and she's wrong, you lose a piece of clothing. BENEDICT Are you insane? RENA We don't get a lot of hot male visitors. MATILDA And you woke us up in the middle of the damn night. Is it a tracking device? BENEDICT No. MATILDA Camo coat. BENEDICT Can’t take it off over the handcuffs. MATILDA Oh, bummer. Pants, then. BENEDICT [panicking a little] It's a simple listening device - like a mystic "bug" Ok? RENA Guess he wins. Sorry Mat. MUSIC AMB COMEDY CLUB [HEARD FROM BACKSTAGE] FAT GUY [punchline to a joke] Boom-boom, boom-boom, boom-boom. SOUND SCATTERED LAUGHTER, NOT MUCH FAT GUY and... Good night! SOUND RUNS IN MANAGER That could have been better. FAT GUY [grumpy] Open mike, read it and weep. BUD Psst. FAT GUY What do you want? BUD I like what you did up there. FAT GUY [knowing] I know who you are. BUD You... do? FAT GUY Yeah, I was warned there's a guy going around with bogus contracts. Screw off. BUD I don't know nothing from bogus. I'm as legit as they come-- FAT GUY [squealing] You want me to call the cops? Jeez! SOUND STOMPS OFF BUD [muttering, furious] Bogus contracts, eh? SOUND HE GOES OUT INTO ALLEY. DOOR SHUTS BUD [furious - cussing in latin] Mater tua caligas gerit! RENA You kiss someone's mother with that mouth? BUD [affable again] You know latin, doll? RENA [shrug] I know cussing. BUD [chuckles] RENA Matilda wanted me to warn you. Someone's on your tail. SOUND MOTORCYCLE REVS, OFF RENA And... He probably followed me here. BUD [not real disturbed] Yikes. RENA I thought I left you in handcuffs. BENEDICT Your sister took pity on me. MATILDA [mic] He's not such a bad guy. BUD All right occifier. I'm not as think as you drunk I am. RENA Don't joke. BENEDICT You might step out of the way, ma'am. RENA [to Bud] You need some help? BUD Why? RENA I don't know. I just thought I'd ask. BUD I'm touched. Oddly. [beat] Nope. It ain't gonna be pleasant, but ain't nothing to be done about that. See you soon, doll. SOUND COUPLE OF FOOTSTEPS, WEIRD WHOOSHING NOISE MATILDA [mic] Well... I'll miss him. RENA Yeah. [sigh, beat] Donuts? SOUND SHE WALKS BACK TO MOTORCYCLE SOUND PHONE RINGS RENA Hmm? SOUND BEEP RENA [wondering] Who the hell? SOUND TURNS ON RENA What? JESSE [phone] Are you doing anything at all? MATILDA [mic] Who’s that? RENA Found her. Job done. JESSE [phone] She’s not back! RENA Yeah. Sucks. She’s still pissed off. MATILDA [mic] Oh, him. What does he expect, that you’ll ride in with his wife over your shoulder, kicking and screaming? RENA I’m not draggin her home by her hair. JESSE [phone] Then what are you doing? RENA I told her to email you a list of demands. Have you checked your email? JESSE [phone] I can’t! The bitch cut off my internet! RENA [sotto voce] Boo-hoo. [up] Hold on. I’m transferring him to you, Matilda. I am not playing phone relay for— SOUND HUGE SPOOOKY WHOOOSHY SOUND SOUND BODY FLUNG INTO WALL RENA Ungh! SOUND PHONE SKITTERS AWAY SOUND THINGS GO WEIRD AND HOLLOW MATILDA [mic] [fading into odd tunnel] Rena? Rena!!!! Rena!!!! MUSIC AMB MATILDA’S LAIR MATILDA [panicking] Rena? [deep shaky breath] Don’t freak out. Don’t freak out. Maybe it’s the cell tower. Maybe it’s-- Maybe its demons. Oh shit. INFERNIQUE Shit is right! MATILDA [almost a scream] Who the fuck are you? INFERNIQUE Where is my BUD? [spooky] What have you done with him? MATILDA [trying hard to stay calm, but kind of losing] Bud? I don’t know! We-we didn’t do anything! [almost a scream] Where’s my sister? INFERNIQUE That’s what I want to know! When I tried to triangulate on her, I got NOTHING. MATILDA Triangulate? INFERNIQUE Anyone who deals with us has a sort of trace on them ...evermore. Until they pass beyond. Is she dead? MATILDA [whine] Nooo? INFERNIQUE If she isn’t then she’s passed out of this realm. She never said she could DO that! MATILDA I’m just going to faint now. I hope you don’t mind... RENA [on speaker, weak] Mat? MATILDA [gasp] INFERNIQUE What? MATILDA [thinking hard] I-I can’t find a good place to fall down. INFERNIQUE She’s on your headset? MATILDA She was, just for a moment. INFERNIQUE [satisfied] hah. There. Yes. She must be in the outer fringe. Guess we won’t be seeing her again. MATILDA [sobbing gasp] MUSIC AMB ECHOEY DUNGEON BUD Babe? RENA [waking] What? Oh, crap. Am I dead? Cuz having to listen to you forever is kind of like my vision of hell. BUD Yeah, she’s okay. RENA [weak] Matilda? BUD Back home where she belongs. RENA [sigh of relief] Not hell, then. SOUND CHAINS RENA What’s with the— SOUND CHAINS RENA Shit. BUD Yeah, that. I guess I-uh kinda underestimated Willy-boy. RENA Is that that demon hunter? BUD [snort of laughter] Oh, him. Nah. That was all part of Willy’s plan to get me off his case. RENA oh. The demon you were undermining. BUD Bingo! I love a bright dame. RENA And now he’s got us both chained up in a dungeon? Great. WILLY [demonic sounding] Just what I was thinking! Muhahahahahahaha [evil laugh] RENA [undertone, to herself] Be vewwy vewwy quiet. [up] Wow. This is a swell party. WILLY You're only here because I'm curious what would make a mortal... collaborate with such a filthy maggot as Beelzebud. RENA You make it sound a lot more fun than it is. BUD Hey, hey! Willy, old boy-- WILLY [demon] You will call me Willial [will-LIE-ul]! [back normal] Don't think I don't know what you've been up to, behind my back, Beelzebud! BUD ahhh. A few short circuits. It's all in fun. Plus you got me back, but good - setting a popper on me. RENA [half a snort] Popper? BUD The hunter - [offhand] you know, you led him to me. RENA Yeah. Sorry bout that. WILLY I'm surprised to see you still up and around, Bud. BUD Believe it or not, I'm clean. RENA It's not like he just up and decided he wanted your crappy job, Willy. BUD [quiet] I really prefer my own crappy job. WILLY You should have kept your hands off my beeswax, then! RENA Oy vay. [quiet, to Bud] Can this guy actually do anything? To me, I mean? BUD [evasive] Not legitimately. RENA [up] Then maybe you'll back the fuck out of my face, elmer fudd, and let me go. BUD On the other hand he's already more or less kidmapped you, so who knows what else he's willing to do. RENA Shit. BUD Yeah, like anything a stupid mortal chick says is going to piss Willial off more than I already have. Hah! WILLY [suspicious] You're up to something. RENA Nah, just mouthing off. [whisper] Keep him talking. BUD So, Willy - Ooh! [snide] You kidnapped a human, what's the next step? Custodial interference? Stealing candy from a baby? WILLY I-I'm not sure. I mean, I haven't decided yet what all to do with you. For now, I'll let you stew. SOUND DOOR SLAMS RENA [sigh] Nice try. BUD [not quite lying] Try? RENA Yeah, whatever. BUD [beat] If we had cards, I play a mean Canasta. RENA Takes two decks. SOUND TAPPING FINGERS, WAITING SOUND DISTANT COMMOTION BUD Finally. Beez. Thought they'd never get here. RENA [surprised] You were expecting someone? BUD Waitaminute, you were? Oh, boy - this could be a serious case of overkill.... SOUND DOOR SLAMS OPEN RENA You ain't just whistling dixie. BENEDICT [breathing hard from exertion] Ok, this is not what I was expecting. RENA You got something for chains? BUD Uh, we might wanna wait-- RENA [suspicious] Why? INFERNIQUE [distant demony scream] Beelzebud! BUD Yeah. That. RENA Demon hunter - you, guy. BENDICT Benedict. RENA Right, like Shakespeare. I'm bad with names. BENDICT Let me get those chains-- RENA Quick! What's the penalty for illegal imprisonment of a human? INFERNIQUE [a little closer] Where is he? BUD It ain't much. He didn't hurt you or nothing. RENA Well? BENEDICT Something like a hundred years of hemorrhoids. I don't actually sentence-- RENA Wanna stick him with something worse? BUD [speculative] I like where this is going. BENEDICT I ...don't. MUSIC INFERNIQUE [roaring up] What did you do with him? WILLY You are in my domain, succubus! INFERNIQUE Insults? How dare you! BUD [off, pathetic] Ohhhhhh.... INFERNIQUE Out of my way! WILLY [surprised] What the hell? BUD [off, weak] Is that you, baby snakes? SOUND DOOR SLAMS OPEN WILLY [bewildred] But I didn't-- INFERNIQUE [incensed] Chained? BUD Oh, babe. I'm so glad to see you. Willy there whupped my fanny, but good. WILLY I-I-- RENA I think the popper is concussed. INFERNIQUE [amazed] Popper? WILLY [an octave higher] Popper? BUD You're gonna get us out of these, aren't you sweetie? RENA Wake up, dude! SOUND GENTLE SLAPPING TO TRY AND ROUSE HIM INFERNIQUE [speculative] You... chained a popper? WILLY I-I- He-- they-- INFERNIQUE Just nod your head, handsome. RENA [quiet] I'm hunting wabbits. BENEDICT [smothered snort of laughter] BUD Come on babe, leave Willy alone. Get me out of here. INFERNIQUE That's Willial, you little weasel. [laughs contemptuously] I think it's about time to trade up. WILLY I- uh- I- uh-- INFERNIQUE [very hot] There's nothing sexier than a tongue-tied demon. RENA [trying to sound upset but not getting it] After all Bud has done for you! BUD [grovelling] You can't just leave us here! INFERNIQUE Willy will let you go when he's good and ready, won't you? WILLY [frantic] Uh, Beelzebud? BUD Fine! Keep your job! Take my woman! You have everything! [big mock sob] SOUND DOOR SLAMS SHUT MUSIC SOUND MATILDA'S DEN SOUND WHOOSH OF ARRIVAL BENEDICT I honestly don't know which of you was worse, back there. RENA Emoting is not in my skill set. BUD Tell me about it. MATILDA You're back! RENA Yeah, it's all okay. MATILDA I thought-- RENA [strangely gentle] You know I always promised if I die I'd come right back and haunt you. MATILDA [sob of relief] BENEDICT Can we--? RENA Fuck off, will you guys? BUD I got this. SOUND WHOOSH MATILDA I was [hiccupy sob] I was so-- RENA I'm here. You're not alone. Maybe I should get that Benedict guy back - he owes us a pair of pants. MATILDA [laughs and cries] SOUND PHONE RINGS RENA Voice mail? MATILDA [much calmer] Voice mail. Yeah. JESSE [on voice mail] What did you do to my wife? All of a sudden she's laying down the law and saying she won't put up with me unless I toe the line! Man! She's even talking about us writing up some kind of contract! Are you even listening? SOUND BEEP END