Do you believe in miracles?

Of course not, you're too old for such frivolous nonsense right? You're a grown up. You've experienced the world. You've loved, you've lost, you've accepted reality and the disappointment that comes with it.

But that doesn't mean miracles stopped believing in you friends. Where's the proof you ask? Why it's in the pudding. And that metaphorical pudding is a surprise cinematic sensation known henceforth as none other than Road House 2024.

Don't believe me? Well then clearly you have yet to press play on the miracle.

Oh, sure you doubt, it only makes sense. A perfect remake of a cult classic can't be done they said. But they were wrong. And therefore they suck.

I too doubted the prophecy foretold of the glorious second coming. I too scoffed at the idea of improvement and revitalizatition. I too... sucked. But I am happy to report I now suck no more.

For I now have hope for a brighter tomorrow, appreciation for my fellow human beings, and the motivation to conquer global warming with a swift roundhouse kick

to the sternum.

In other words I have mother fucking Road House 2024. You can too.

So tune in and get turnt up. If you haven't seen this movie yet you better hop to it like someone just paid you $5,000 down and $500 a night.

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