We survived the (non) apocalypse but can you survive our first episode of 2013 that covers every game ever? That’s right, the No Quarters crew is back with Sad Tales of Skyrim, Anarchy Reigns, Dishonored, Space Team, Frog Fractions, Halo 4, and every other game ever made. They’re all covered in this episode, so sit back and commit to a full day of joyous game podcasting!

NQcast46 – R. Kelly’s Wii Game

First half!

* Anarchy Reigns (5:37 – Chuck and Harlo discover it’s Beating Up Waves Of Dudes: The Game! Just don’t play as Bayonetta in multiplayer. Trust us.)

* FTL: Faster Than Light (14:22 – Harlo and Chuck learn that Oregon Trail in space is the best and worst of roguelikes! They realize this after hours pass without them noticing.)

* Far Cry 3 (23:45 – Maki, Harlo and Chuck try out some co-op and journey back to the jungle to hunt more animals and kill more pirates with VD. Also, Harlo’s future gaming is ruined by this game.)

* Hitman: Blood Money (38:23 – Harlo realizes you can’t go back. Older games want you to play the way they want you to play them, even if you don’t want to play them that way. Sadness ensues.)

* Dishonored (45:01 – BJ, Harlo and Chuck sneak around and eventually give up pacifism and murder EVERYONE. Because no-killing is LAME. Also, Chuck discovers he doesn’t have the patience for stealth games.)

* Spec Ops: The Line (1:12:34 – Maki, Chuck and Harlo discover that killing people in games is a bad thing, but sometimes the game won’t give you any other choice. At what point is the story more important than the gameplay? Or vice versa?)

* Halo 4 (1:32:15 – Chuck gets bored while he tries to care about the story. He fails.)

Second Half! (1:38:32)

* Sniper Elite V2 (1:38:56 – BJ and Harlo snipe lots of dudes but realize the game isn’t nearly as good when they force you not to be a sniper. Also, the Kill Hitler DLC disappoints us greatly. The out Harlo’s review video!)

* Skyrim (1:55:34 – Harlo begins his adventures into Sad Tales of Skyrim™. We blame the Dawnguard DLC, vampires and lockups.)

* Dead Space 1 & 2 (2:06:54 – Maki and Chuck catch up on a couple of the best games this generation before Dead Space 3 comes out. The sound design is still unmatched. Playing on the hardest difficulty makes it an even better game, too!)

* World of Warcraft (2:17:02 – BJ goes to Azeroth for reasons unknown and the rest of the podcast members berate him for this. Eventually we talk about Eve Online and other MMO craziness.)

* Frog Fractions (2:28:28 – Maki and Chuck experience the weirdness that is Frog Fractions. We will say no more and pass you the link.)

* XBLA Corner! (2:31:32)

* Mark of the Ninja (2:32:08 – Harlo plays as a ninja named Mark. We think. It’s a MARKed step up from Shank. Ha! See what I did there? I’ll see myself out now.)

* Deadlight (2:36:15 – Chuck loves 1/3rd of this game, hates 1/3rd of this game and is ambivalent towards 1/3rd of this game. Guess which section is which!)

* Hell Yeah! Wrath of the Dead Rabbit (2:41:14 – Harlo plays this SEGA throwback side-scrolling slice of insanity. “If Sonic had guns,” sound about right?)

* DLC Corner! (2:47:55)

* Borderlands 2: Sir Hammerlock’s Big Hunt (2:48:03 – Harlo finishes it in one sitting and decides this is the first truly optional B2 DLC.)

* Asura’s Wrath: Lost Episode 1 & 2 (2:50:51 – Maki BURSTS with anger as he plays this pointless Street Fighter 4 themed DLC.)