"Because of its near universality, heterosexuality is one of the most unifying forces in all of humanity...Imagine missing that one key piece of your humanity and what that would feel like. It's a slow terror. And once you are gripped by that fear, a glowing red-hot brand ascends from the depths of the earth, up through rock and soil, and bursts forth to sear three black words right onto your heart . . . You. Are. Broken Part of being young and gay is the feeling of being broken, of being trapped inside a fleshy machine that is inexplicably flawed. And you have no idea why."

Episode 13 • On Broken Machines

(Note: Blue Babies Pink is like an audio book. Start with the Prologue, then Episode 1, Episode 2, etc.)For nearly a decade, Brett Trapp Harman kept a secret journal of thoughts on being gay and Christian, knowing one day he'd shout the story he feared most.On a Wednesday morning in late 2016, he logged on to Facebook and began shouting...He started by publishing a Gossip Guide to his sexuality—a cheeky way to let friends know his secret. He then began sharing the vivid details of his story through a 44-episode memoir, published as one episode per day. He called the story Blue Babies Pink. Within days, Blue Babies Pink began to spread through social media. Thousands of readers tuned in, eagerly waiting for the daily installment to be released. Readers resonated deeply with Brett's struggle with faith, loneliness, shame, singleness, workaholism, and uncertainty. Called "the Netflix of blogs," more than 100,000 people have read or listened to Blue Babies Pink to date.

Personal Journals

Society & Culture

History

Philosophy

Places & Travel

Religion & Spirituality

Other

Spirituality

Christianity

Buddhism

Hinduism

Judaism

Islam

Sexuality

Health

Health & Fitness

Brett's final thoughts on the journey of Blue Babies Pink...

Epilogue • My Little Speaking Up

NOTE: This is the finale of Blue Babies Pink. If you haven't read the previous 43 episodes, please do that before listening to Episode 44. Also, after listening to this one, be sure to check out the Epilogue for the final wrap-up.

Episode 44 • Love Storms

"I sprinted down that path, through the trees, all the way out to the boat dock—heaving, shaking, and sobbing as I ran. I felt like I might choke, fighting for breath. My face poured wet salt onto the summer grass below..."

Episode 43 • Tears on a Boat Dock

"I began to think a lot then about the role of a spouse, of a companion. I'd never been in anything close to a meaningful relationship, and I'd slammed the door on love years before, so I was clueless about it all."

Episode 42 • Someone to Run Home To

"My whole life, I'd been taught that God's design for the world was men and women getting married and making babies. This formed family units which were the building blocks of society. So it made sense that the institution of marriage would lead to great human flourishing."

Episode 13 • On Broken Machines

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