On Listening

Megan Mack is executive producer of “Connections” at WXXI. She is an improvisational theatre performer and teacher. Megan earned her bachelor's degree in Television-Radio-Film from the S.I. Newhouse School of Public Communications, and her bachelor's degree in Italian Language, Literature, and Culture from the College of Arts and Sciences at Syracuse University. She is also a graduate of The Second City’s Conservatory program. We discuss listening and a variety of other topics!

Andrew Heartman is a 12-year veteran surrogate partner, who is passionate about overcoming misconceptions about Surrogate Partner Therapy (SPT) and disseminating accurate information about the practice. As part of this mission, he presents regularly to private practices, therapist organizations, university classes, and podcasts like "On Listening." As co-founder of the Surrogate Partner Collective and mentor to surrogate partners in training, he is committed to elevating the professionalism of those who engage in this therapy modality as well as the understanding of the public. More information, including videos and interviews, can be found at https://www.surrogatepartner.us/
We discuss his work and how listening figures in SPT.

Graham Bodie, PhD is at the School of Journalism and New Media at University of Mississippi. He is a researcher and professor with a focus on Listening.
Dr. Bodie is an internationally recognized expert on listening and has published over 80 monographs, book chapters, and encyclopedia entries. His most recent project, The Sourcebook of Listening Research (Wiley-Blackwell), is a comprehensive resource that reviews and critiques current and potential approaches to measuring listening. Dr. Bodie serves as an executive advisor for the Listen First Project and vice chairperson for the Global Listening Centre. Dr. Bodie received his bachelor’s degree and master’s degree in Communication from Auburn University and his Ph.D. from Purdue University.

We discuss listening, empathy what the idea of being a ‘good listener’ even means and Listen First as a tool to help people develop listening skills and reduce societal polarization.

Eva Goldfarb, PhD, is a Professor of Public Health at Montclair State University. She works in the field of sexuality education developing and leading sexuality education and sexual health programs with youth, parents, educators and other professionals. She loves teaching and working with students is her passion. Two notable achievements are her work in development of the public domain Rights Respect and Responsibility sex education program and the study we discuss today in the Journal of Adolescent Health with her co-author Lisa Lieberman Three Decades of Research: The Case for Comprehensive Sex Education.

In this episode of On Listening, we have Dr. Judi Brownell, professor at the SE Johnson College of Business at Cornell University and author of the textbook Listening: Attitudes, Principles, and Skills now in its 7th edition. Dr. Brownell is past president and currently active member of the International Listening Association. We talk about the scientific model of listening she developed entitled the HURIER model which breaks listening down into skills and other psychological and contextual elements. Dr. Brownell recommends some specific methods to become a better listener and advocates that more time be spent teaching listening skills in all institutions of learning from Kindergarten and up as well as in corporate trainings. Learn more about Dr. Brownell by visiting her faculty page (https://sha.cornell.edu/faculty-research/faculty/jlb18/).

In this episode of On Listening, I have the distinct privilege to interview Michel Zaken, secondary education professional and Deaf woman. She engaged with me via Zoom along with her interpreter Nicole Lupinetti. Michel helped me understand the experience of listening for the d/Deaf and hard of hearing population with the caveat that she does not speak for all d/Deaf people. We discuss American Sign Language - a strictly visual language - and how it differs from American English. She exposes myths around deafness and discusses the experience from the lens of having a “deaf gain” as well as living with a disability. We also explore “audism” which is the bias that d/Deaf people are in some way less than. I learned more in this podcast than any other and so appreciate her thoughtfulness and connection on this topic.

In this episode of On Listening I interview Elliot Kronenfeld, LICSW, PhD(c) owner of Insight Brookline, a mental clinic in the Boston area specializing in mental health across the lifespan. Elliot’s areas of interest are infidelity, infertility and intimacy skills. He is the author of Couples by Intention and we discuss his experiences with running education groups with couples - teaching and exploring listening skills. Elliot and I explore deep listening, as well as disenfranchised grief. Elliot has a knack for labeling skills and tools; this helps me conceptualize what he is doing and sharing. I admire his skills. Elliot is very personal in his storytelling and I am sure you will enjoy him maybe as much as I enjoy him!

In this episode of On Listening I have the distinct pleasure of interviewing Herb Smith (https://rpo.org/conductors-musicians/#musicians). Herb is founder of the Freedom Trio and is Third Trumpeter of the Rochester Philharmonic Orchestra and conducts for them as well. Herb and I discuss the importance of listening in music: almost 50% of performing is listening to other performers and students need to learn to listen to themselves as they practice. Herb and I share feelings about the killing of George Floyd and the Black Lives Matter movement, his excitement that the RPO performed at a BLM rally, and we were both hopeful about change as racism is caught on camera. Periodically the only Black person in the entire Eastman Theatre during a concert, Herb shares his experiences in his mostly white world. In the City of Rochester almost 40% of the population is Black (https://datausa.io/profile/geo/rochester-ny/#:~:text=The%205%20largest%20ethnic%20groups,%2DHispanic)%20(3.22%25) yet in his graduating class at Eastman and as a performer, Blacks were and are represented significantly less. Enjoy a Rochester treasure.

David Prescott (https://www.davidprescott.net/), Clinical Social Worker editor of Safer Society Press and international consultant talks about listening and we explore listening as we attend to how we listen to each other. I have the unfortunate experience of losing the mic and rely on my built-in laptop mic. Listening is truly difficult and David approaches this with a sense of humility. I start thinking about a Taxonomy of Listening… what kind of listening is called for in different situations. We discuss how challenging it is to listen to people who have committed sex crimes as a therapist, and David discusses how trying to understand the context and purpose of the offender’s words - how he fits into their life for one – can balance can balance the possible sympathy for that person and the role of reflection in listening. As a frequent laugher, we discuss the risk of laughter in conversation and how this can be misinterpreted.

Alli O’Malley joins us from good old Rochester NY. She served as CEO of RESOLVE of Greater Rochester (resolve-roc.org), a community based domestic violence prevention organization from 2008-2019. Alli is a survivor of inter-generational domestic violence, and is a strong voice for reforming systems to better address not only the needs of victims/survivors but also of perpetrators to ensure they desist from further violence and coercion. In our interview she suggests that preventing domestic violence involves promoting agency for both victims and those who abused them; and together we explore common challenges of the work, including the prevalence of the issue, necessary changes in related language and terminology, victim blaming, and gaps in community responses that focus on punishment instead of remediation.