Where in this movie is the Suzette character?  This Countess loves pushing ladies to the ground.  Not a chance that the Countess could pass for 390 years old when she is clearly 400.  How is it this hard to find a virgin?  Just grab a baby.  Mark fondling this painting is supposed to be funny but it is just dumb.  The Countess is a real bargain hunter.  Miami dudes are always goofy in the background.  John has some knowledge about vintage vampire clothing.  This shower scene is predictable.  Do vampires hiss?  These dream sequences are way too long.  This final chase scene is maximum stupid.  Thanks to our friend Stef of A Ghost in the Magazine podcast for joining us.

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