It's 1,253 days until the legally defined end of the 47th presidency, but we have very little faith that will be the case.  In the meantime, continue to attend your local music festival, and don't forget basic supplies like hats, sunglasses, neck garters, and local organization. Individuals are powerful martyrs, but ineffective at making a difference in the moment or the long term. Move together, move as one.

Zyn to MAHA Pipeline

Guillotines are Bipartisan

Sauced Broccoli

Spready to the Gods

Man who asked ChatGPT about cutting out salt from his diet was hospitalized with hallucinations https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/man-asked-chatgpt-cutting-salt-diet-was-hospitalized-hallucinations-rcna225055

US Hits Highest Layoffs Since COVID https://www.newsweek.com/us-hits-highest-layoffs-since-covid-2111794

Supreme Court formally asked to overturn landmark same-sex marriage ruling https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/supreme-court-formally-asked-overturn-landmark-same-sex/story?id=124465302

Trump puts DC police department under federal control, deploys National Guard https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/trump-hold-news-conference-crime-dc-after-threatening/story?id=124528406

It's 1,261 days until the legally defined end of the 47th presidency, but we have very little faith that will be the case. This week we continue to have issues discussing the news, because it all sucks or doesn't actually mean anything. An old man walks on a roof to avoid being outed as a rapist, the Canadians do anti-war-crimes... anyway, here's Wonderwall.

Krispy Gnome

Uppers and Dialators

Dumb Earth Theory

Short Willie Long

Trump removes Billy Long as IRS commissioner, giving him the shortest-ever tenure in the role https://apnews.com/article/billy-long-out-as-irs-commissioner-3dbf8315a69a320b91ae629dab41b159

Trump takes unusual stroll on White House roof, continues to avoid Epstein file release https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/trump-ways-spend-money-white-house-roof/story?id=124385658

Canada are the good guys https://www.canada.ca/en/global-affairs/news/2025/08/canadian-armed-forces-air-drop-humanitarian-assistance-in-gaza.html

Tucson City Council rejects Project Blue data center amid intense community pressure https://azluminaria.org/2025/08/06/tucson-city-council-rejects-project-blue-amid-intense-community-pressure/ 

It's 1,268 days until the legally defined end of the 47th presidency, but we have very little faith that will be the case. This week the show runs a little long, but things pick up in the second half, roughly minute 56. Start there for real shit, but listen all the way through for our usual dissociative waffling.

Matthew 14:88

Not Enough Ballroom

The Guilted Age

Psalms 109

The ICJ Rules That Failing to Combat Climate Change Could Violate International Law https://www.wired.com/story/the-icj-rules-failing-to-combat-climate-could-be-a-violation-of-international-law/

Trump's EPA wants to eliminate regulation for greenhouse gases https://www.npr.org/2025/07/29/nx-s1-5482966/trump-climate-change-epa

Trump fires labor statistics boss hours after the release of weak jobs report https://www.nbcnews.com/business/economy/trump-orders-firing-bls-commissioner-weak-jobs-report-rcna222531

The First Widespread Cure for HIV Could Be in Children https://www.wired.com/story/the-first-widespread-cure-for-hiv-could-be-in-children/

It's 1,275 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Administration, provided the US Constitution still exists then. In the meantime, Ghislaine Maxwell is pursuing a pardon/immunity over the Epstein files, seeing as people can't be sent to prison for evidence that definitely doesn't exist, and turned in over 100 names in a partial immunity deposition (tf?!). Also, Micro Johnson made headlines in the new South Park episode and decided that the House August recess begins in July now.

Partial Temporary Immunity

Fascism Any Percent Speedrun

Jizz Hands

Head for HR

House speaker starts August recess early to avoid Jeffrey Epstein votes https://ground.news/article/house-speaker-starts-august-recess-early-to-avoid-jeffrey-epstein-votes_e51710?utm_source=mobile-app&utm_medium=newsroom-share

Ghislaine Maxwell talked about ‘100 different people’ during DOJ’s Epstein interview, lawyer says https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/ghislaine-maxwell-epstein-interview-lawyer-doj-b2796295.html

Columbia University agrees to pay more than $220M in deal with Trump to restore federal funding https://apnews.com/article/columbia-trump-deal-00eef5dca9f003e593d2cb151f5cce17?user_email=771d6ac6f68b6f16a377b68580932f4fe424df3070eb4ee06aa6a3339c36a9c2

Our vanishing infrastructure is bad for our mental health https://medium.com/blog/the-vanishing-infrastructure-of-our-emotional-wellbeing-e41289cbe76a

It's 1,282 days until the legally defined end of Trump’s second term, and we’re getting more and more concerned about the democratic establishment writ large. Trump has already threatened to “fix” New York’s elections if he doesn’t like the mayoral victor, and the GOP are already looking to re-draw district lines to remove Democrats from Congress.

Viet Conga Line

Trad Waifu

It's Too Hairy

Trump’s $1.1 Billion Cuts to NPR, PBS Pass Republican-Controlled House https://www.thewrap.com/trump-cuts-npr-pbs-pass-republican-house/

Schiff, Warren demand to know if CBS is ending Stephen Colbert's 'Late Show' for 'political reasons' https://www.foxnews.com/media/schiff-warren-speculate-cbs-ending-stephen-colberts-late-show-political-reasons.amp

Trump, 79, Had Emergency Heart Tests Because of Swollen Legs https://www.thedailybeast.com/trump-79-had-emergency-heart-tests-because-of-swollen-legs/

Mike Johnson Says GOP Should Put “Everything Out There” on Epstein, Then Votes No to Release Epstein Info https://www.vanityfair.com/news/story/mike-johnson-says-gop-should-put-everything-out-there-on-epstein-then-votes-no-to-release-epstein-info

It's 1,289 days until the legally defined end of Trump's second term, and we're getting more and more concerned about the democratic establishment writ large. Trump has already threatened to "fix" New York's elections if he doesn't like the mayoral victor, and the GOP are already looking to re-draw district lines to remove Democrats from Congress.

Tommy Commie Tatas

NOAA’s Ark

Pam’s Empty Binder

Ag Secretary says able-bodied Medicaid recipients should replace immigrant farm workforce https://www.politico.com/live-updates/2025/07/08/congress/rollins-says-able-bodied-medicaid-recipients-should-replace-immigrant-farm-workforce-00442065

Trump says US must send more weapons to Ukraine, days after ordering pause in deliveries https://apnews.com/article/russia-ukraine-war-drone-attacks-c7a1bf1a28ecd2853c037f1864ef7edc

Alligator Alcatraz firm donated to Florida GOP before getting a contract https://www.yahoo.com/news/alligator-alcatraz-firm-donated-florida-115900977.html

Man with an assault rifle killed after shooting at a Border Patrol facility in Texas https://apnews.com/article/mcallen-texas-border-patrol-shooting-8241ec60d26e54d7582a7e77f6ece01e

It's the 249th Independence Day. The Podcast crew is off celebrating, but we figured we'd drop a message to keep the feed active.

Let's look at the foundational documents that formed the Republic and ask: Will the United States survive as a democracy for 250 years? If not, what should go into the next Declaration against this modern tyranny?

RIP USA

It was a good run

The New Founders War

The Declaration of Independence: https://docs.house.gov/meetings/GO/GO00/20220929/115171/HHRG-117-GO00-20220929-SD010.pdf 

The Constitution: https://constitutioncenter.org/media/files/constitution.pdf

Common Sense: https://loveman.sdsu.edu/docs/1776ThomasPaine.pdf 

Federalist Papers: https://guides.loc.gov/federalist-papers/full-text

H.R.1 The OBBB: https://www.congress.gov/bill/119th-congress/house-bill/1/text 

It's 1,303 days until the legally defined end of Donald Trump's second presidential term. Sadly, all forms of legal definition and enforcement have lost all meaning in roughly 6 years (counting from his first term). The question now stands: will the United States survive as a democracy until then? If not, what new horrible form will it take?

SCROTUM

Beef Pee

Nut Up

Angry ICE

U.S. Supreme Court limits nationwide injunctions, in case on Trump birthright citizenship order https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/scotus-opinion-trump-casa-1.7572403

Supreme Court pauses district court order preventing immigrants from being deported to third-party countries https://www.scotusblog.com/2025/06/supreme-court-pauses-district-court-order-preventing-immigrants-from-being-deported-to-third-party-countries/

What we know about US strikes on three Iranian nuclear sites https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cvg9r4q99g4o

House shelves effort to impeach Trump over Iran strikes https://apnews.com/article/trump-impeachment-al-green-684036326d3f80d6c7cdc167f2d508c3

Zohran Mamdani beats Cuomo in NY Dem Primary https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2025/06/25/nyc-mayor-zohran-mamdani-means-for-democrats/84350378007/

It's 1,306 days until the legally-defined end of the 47th Administration, pending serious congressional moves in 2027. In the meantime, we have to keep on keeping on. The No Kings protests were certainly inspiring, providing real, concrete hope that this entire nation has gone to the dogs, just the worst people in it.

Nazi Allergy

Samurai Sword Missile

GRU: New Look, Same Great Taste

State Supreme Court could order hand recount of Rockland’s 2024 Ballot https://rocklandtimes.com/2025/06/19/state-supreme-court-could-order-hand-recount-of-rocklands-2024-ballot/

Israeli hospital hit by Iranian missile strike https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cj4edzy0vqeo

Uganda Scheme https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uganda_Scheme

Largest data breach in history

https://www.tomshardware.com/tech-industry/cyber-security/16-billion-accounts-exposed-in-one-of-the-largest-data-breaches-in-history-enormous-data-haul-holds-two-accounts-for-every-human-alive

Meet "The Cliterati," The Secretive Feminist Mafia Humiliating Trump https://thehalfwaycafe.substack.com/p/meet-the-cliterati-the-secretive

It's 1,315 days until the legally-defined end of the 47th Administration, and things are getting tense. LA is the latest ring-wing whipping boy, Israel decided that they've flattened enough of the Gaza Strip and the latest cool idea is open war with Iran. Also, according to Ukrainian officials, over 1,000,000 invaders have been killed in their war. Congratulations, Putin!

Non-Guild Actors

Military-Issue Rubbers

Iron Dome NOW with Human Shielding

Senator Alex Padilla handcuffed for asking questions: https://apnews.com/video/cellphone-footage-shows-california-sen-alex-padillas-removal-from-noems-la-press-conference-8a99118de8a74eb6a569f72cd970698d

Israel Attacks Iran: https://apnews.com/article/iran-explosions-israel-tehran-00234a06e5128a8aceb406b140297299

Immigration Raids affect businesses that supply food: https://apnews.com/article/immigration-raids-california-farmworkers-1301639766f55c8d4e8e15ff2fd45687

Trump booed at the Kennedy center:  https://apnews.com/video/trump-booed-and-cheered-at-the-kennedy-center-while-attending-les-miserables-645c4773796b4d64b57f23a16ee78358

E.Jean Carol wins again: https://apnews.com/article/trump-e-jean-carroll-sexual-abuse-appeal-8e2db7bdb881ff0b9353b6fb17750f48