November 05, 2020

One Woman’s Kindness Sparks a Neighborhood To Do the Same

20 minutes

ONCE UPON A GENE - EPISODE 055

We live in Mercer Island, a beautiful city across the bridge from Seattle. It's safe, quiet and clean and it's only missing an inclusive playground. I don't know many people here. I met a mom through birth to three, two other moms who emailed me after reading about my podcast in the Mercer Island Reporter and my two neighbors.

Casey, the kids and I recently went out on a family walk before the Seahawks game on a perfect fall day. We were walking through the park when I saw a woman walking on the path in the opposite direction, she saw Ford and she had the biggest smile on her face when she greeted him. She brought her dog over and asked Ford if he wanted to pet him, assuring him when he seemed afraid. She told us about The Friendship Circle and mentioned that her kids volunteered there. The Friendship Circle is a community center where kids can go and play with other kids. We've never had this experience with strangers and I decided to post on the Nextdoor app about the exchange. I wrote:

I have a 4 year old son who was born with a rare disease called CTNNB1. His awesome, red wheelchair is a source of freedom and independence. If you ever see him around town, he's usually squealing with delight, as he loves exploring with the wind on his face. As you can probably imagine, this has been such a complex and difficult experience. Aside from all the fear, medical issues and burying my expectations of what I thought motherhood would be, one of the most difficult parts of this journey is the social isolation aspect. I've found so many of my people through starting a podcast, but one of my social aspects involves not just me and my family, but my beautiful son directly. Kids and adults are usually extremely awkward and stare. I say hello to everyone we pass, but especially when a child or adult hover and look upon this sweet child. I tell my son to wave hello. And 95% of the time, we don't get a response. It's so constant that I don't get as heartbroken about these situations as I did in the beginning. Today at Mercerdale Park, a woman stopped in her tracks, gathered her three boys to extend an excited and genuine hello to my son. They engaged with him like he was just like every other little boy at the park. She brought her dog over to him so he could give it a pat. Nobody's ever done that- ever. It was one of the most glorious, human moments we've experienced as a family out and about in four years. Thank you so much to that woman and to her boys. I wish more parents were raising their kids this way, to see disability as a diversity. I'll never forget it. I ask from the bottom of my mama heart that there be conversations about kids like mine in your home. Not just when you see us at the grocery store, but often, as often as you educate them about other types of diversity. And if you see the happiest, blondest little 4 year old wheeling around downtown, don't be afraid to say hello.

I didn't have any expectations in writing this, but was hoping the woman we met in the park would read it, connect and we could get her name and thank her. Instead, I got 447 likes, 60 really thoughtful responses, 37 private messages and everyone showed up. I got so many invited for Ford to come play with their kids. I got so many loving notes from strangers. A community I didn't feel a part of circled around me from a simple post. I'm so thankful. I learned from this post that people are good, they just don't know what to do, so they do nothing.

LINKS AND RESOURCES MENTIONED

The Friendship Circle of Washington

https://www.friendshipcirclewa.org/

TUNE INTO THE ONCE UPON A GENE PODCAST

Spotify

https://open.spotify.com/show/5Htr9lt5vXGG3ac6enxLQ7

Apple Podcasts

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/once-upon-a-gene/id1485249347

Stitcher

https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/once-upon-a-gene

Overcast

https://overcast.fm/itunes1485249347/once-upon-a-gene