As parents, we have to overcome our histories to be excellent.  If you were raised in anger, you have to overcome that reinforcement history and respond in different ways than how you were trained.  If you grew up regularly criticized, you will have to overcome a tendency on your part to find the negative and overreact with the heavy hand of criticism.  

Ambivalent soothing and ambivalence in the attachment relationship is a very tough thing to overcome.  But, consistency is the goal!