Parents — sometimes you have to say NO. And mean it.

We all love our kids. I’ve got eight — I get it.

But I can’t tell you how many arguments I’ve had with sporting parents whose child didn’t get selected in a team and who want to blame the system or the coach or the selectors or anyone and everyone they can find.

Instead of saying:

“You didn’t make it this time. I love you. I’ll be right here beside you as you work to get there next time — if that’s what you choose to do.”

…….the parents abuse the selectors.

They write letters to the national body.

They whine about how the system is unfair, how it’s all geared against their child, how their kid is better than the others and a million other gripes.

Every time a parent does this, the child learns: “The word “no” means my parents will negotiate a “yes” for me”.

Kids need to learn they can’t win all the time.

They need to learn that no matter how hard they try, life isn’t always fair.

They need to learn they can’t always get what they want.

Teach them to accept setbacks. To learn from disappointments. To move forward quickly without regrets.

That’s not cruelty. That’s parenting.

What’s the best lesson a setback taught your child?

Wayne Goldsmith

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