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Physical Escalation from Friends to Lovers: the Nerd Love Story of Jose and Julian


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What does a natural physical escalation look like? ✋ Physical touch varies from person to person, even within a shared culture. Some people see certain things as friendly that for others are way too intimate, or are only comfortable going slower or faster.

🥋 Julian met Jose's brother learning Tae Kwon-Do. They started hanging out, and later invited Jose to join them. She didn't think much of it until almost a year later, when they started spending a lot of time together. So much time, in fact, that her friends kept asking if something was going on. She even went on a trip and he was the first person she was texting every day! That's when she realized that... she might like him 🤔

😱 After the realization set in, the fears showed up: what if it didn't work and she lost both a partner and the friendship? Fortunately, she was quite sure he liked her back. They were both comfortable with physical touch with each other, which is not always the case.

🎧 If you've been wondering how fast is too fast, or if there's a right or wrong way to break the physical barrier with someone, give this episode a listen!

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Timestamps for lazy nerds:

00:00:00 Intro

00:00:56 Her Brother's Friend

00:04:02 Hanging Out 1-on-1

00:07:40 Fears Around Liking Your Friend

00:15:23 Leaving the Friend Zone

00:19:58 Breaking the Touch Barrier

00:25:41 Differences in Styles of Physical Touch

00:33:49 Checking if They're Comfortable

00:37:07 Testing for Interest


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Roll to DateBy Alex | Dating Anxiety Coach for Nerds