Scripture: John 16:17-22

His disciples said, “See! Now you speak plainly; you aren’t using figures of speech. Now we know that you know everything and you don’t need anyone to ask you. Because of this we believe you have come from God.”

Jesus replied, “Now you believe? Look! A time is coming—and is here!—when each of you will be scattered to your own homes and you will leave me alone. I’m not really alone, for the Father is with me. I’ve said these things to you so that you will have peace in me. In the world you have distress. But be encouraged! I have conquered the world.”

Consider:

I once worked with a Pastor who was obsessed with the euphemisms we use when someone dies. You know, the ones like “Passed Away” or “Went to be with Jesus”. He understood why people use them - it’s polite and kind and gentle, we think - so we say things like “they’ve gone to a better place” or “Went home to be with Jesus.” And by obsessed, I mean he kept a list of the ones he considered most outrageous to which he added every time he ran across a new one in an obituary. It wasn’t unusual to find him in his office, holding a newspaper, yelling, “They died. Why don’t they just say that they died?”

We do try to soften the impact of hard times in loved ones lives by talking around it or avoiding it altogether. When someone is very sick or has died, we get paralyzed by our fear of saying the wrong thing or hurting someone’s very tender heart. That impulse comes from a place of kindness and compassion, but in trying to make it easier for them (and us) it adds a layer of shame over what it is already a difficult truth.

The actual effect of this clouded language is to actually make things worse. Adding a veil over the often painful truth doesn’t make it less, but instead adds to awkwardness and uncertainty. What people most often want is the kindness of acknowledging the truth of their circumstances.

The disciples here are actually relieved Jesus finally told them what was to come in plain, understandable language. Jesus had spent a lot of time trying to soften the blow and make it easier for them to face the uncertain future by speaking in metaphors and allusions. It only made them more confused.

When Jesus tells them the truth straight out it actually brings relief and peace. We always do better with the plain truth, spoken in kindness and love.

Respond:

Take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle.

* Left Column (The Veil): Write down 3–5 euphemisms or “soft” phrases you’ve used recently—or had used on you—regarding a difficult situation (death, job loss, illness, or even a personal failure).

* Right Column (The Plain Truth): Beside each one, write the “plain truth” version in the simplest, kindest language possible.

Look at your Right Column. Take a deep breath and read those “Plain Truth” statements out loud. Notice your physical reaction.

* Does it feel heavier, or do you feel a slight release of tension?

* Does the “Plain Truth” give you a clearer starting point for prayer or action than the “Veil” did?

* Reflect: Why does the plain truth feel like relief (as it did for the disciples) rather than a burden?

Pray:

Lord of Truth,

Forgive me for hiding behind soft words because I am afraid of the weight of the reality. My “kindness” is often just my own discomfort in disguise.

Give me the courage of the plain truth. Help me to stop softening the blow in ways that leave others feeling isolated. Grant me the relief the disciples felt: the peace of hearing things as they truly are.

I thank You that You meet me in the unvarnished reality of my life, not in the euphemisms I use to cover it up.

Amen.

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