18 July 2025

by Teresa Cherfas

Welcome to the 33rd edition of our Russian-language podcast Then & Now with me, Teresa Cherfas

On 15 July 2009, Chechen human rights activist and member of the management committee of the human rights organization “Memorial,” Natalia Estemirova, was murdered. She was abducted near her home in Grozny and taken by car across the border to Ingushetia, where she was shot five times in the chest. The killers fled, leaving her body at the scene of the crime. Her only child was 15 years old. That child recently published a book about her mother, Please Live, and its author is our guest today – Lana Estemirova. 

My Questions

• Our podcast is called Then and Now, and most often it’s about how the full-scale invasion of Ukraine by Russia has impacted people’s lives and perceptions. You wrote in your book that few people cared about your mother’s murder, or the Russian-Chechen wars, or the constant human rights violations, and that all these were but brief mentions at the end of the news, or cursory minutes of international meetings, if at all. By the time Russia invaded Ukraine on 24 February 2022, you wrote, it was too late. What does that date mean for you now?
• In your book, you write warmly about your relatives in Russia and in Chechnya. Are you in touch with them?  Is there a difference between Chechens’ and Russians’ perceptions of the war in Ukraine?
• I imagine it cannot have been easy to write your book. What was the process of writing like? Did you struggle to find your voice?
• How would you describe your mother to people who didn’t know her?
• Your mother’s close friend, Anna Politkovskaya, was killed in the entrance to her apartment building in Moscow in 2006. Do you remember that day? Were you worried about your mother and her safety?
• Your book clearly outlines the stages of the Chechen wars and of Ramzan Kadyrov’s rise to power. How did you feel about him and his influence on your lives? I’m thinking about your protest against compulsory headscarves for schoolgirls, for example.
• Two days ago was the anniversary of the murder of your mother, Natalia Estemirova. The title of your book, Please Live, is a direct reference to that day.  I read your account of how you learned of your mother’s death , about your reactions and emotions on the day and the  immediate aftermath, and of how they changed and evolved over time, of your rage and sadness and your final acceptance of what had happened. These are almost indescribable feelings, and yet you describe them in unforgettable language. What were the most important lessons for you?. After all, the last sentence of your book is: “Happiness is victory.” What did you mean by that?
• You recently became a mother yourself. Tell us about your feelings toward your baby daughter. What will you tell her about her grandmother?

You can read Teresa Cherfas’ review of Please Live. The Chechen Wars, My Mother and Me by Lana Estemirova here.