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"This lesson has nothing to do with Sleeping Beauty," Nicole was feeling pedantic, probably because we'd just given her about fifteen hours of data entry work, and then added annotating this lesson on top. "I mean... what does this podcast even have to do with France." The lack of an answer from our side of the office failed to deter the complaints. "And honestly David, have you ever seen a castle in Hong Kong? There's a reason property prices are so high...."

In retrospect, it may be true that this Cantonese podcast is only loosely based on the classic fairy tale by Charles Perrault. So loosely based that some of you might even say it isn't based at all on the fairy tale. But leaving that aside, this Cantonese lesson is still worth a listen if you're just getting started. Join us and in under ten minutes you'll have enough compliments under your belt to last at least one stop on the Hong Kong metro, which is all it really takes to get a phone number if you meet Mr. or Mrs. Right.

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We'll admit that male grooming patterns in Hong Kong continue to mystify us even after several years of exposure. But while we aren't this mean in real life, it's inevitable that sometimes you might want to be, because it doesn't take a lot of getting quoted the foreign prices before you'll want to toss out a bit of fluent Cantonese to drag the prices down. And that's exactly where this Cantonese lesson comes into play....

Starting to learn Cantonese? This lesson is intended for students with a bit of background in the Cantonese language, so if you're an absolute beginner this one is going to be too difficult for you. Instead, navigate to our first Critical Phrases lesson in our series of Basic Cantonese lessons. You'll be back up here in no time ready to tackle our more difficult material.

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Learning Cantonese? One of the things you'll learn about us here at Popup Cantonese is that we move at a pretty fast pace. But we know some of you are struggling to keep up, which is why in today's lesson we take a step back and review some of the things we've learned at the Beginner level up to now. And if you've been following along you have no excuse not to know the answers to these questions.

Or most of these questions. Because we'll just be honest and admit there's at least one tucked away here that's entirely subjective. Nicole is polite and calls it a bonus question, but don't let that fool you. The rest of us in the office consider it the single most important question on the test, and are willing to issue pass/fail credit on it alone. So see how you do, and please don't fail. At least not the one that really matters.

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1. What does 咩事 mean?

a) what time is it

b) what is it

c) who is it

d) why is it

2. If someone says 唱乜鬼歌啫 to you, he probably means

a) don't sing

b) please sing along

c) what song do you want to sing

d) please sing an English song

3. What does the character 乜 mean in the sentence 唱乜鬼歌啫

a) it means “what”

b) it adds emphasis

c) it softens the tone of the sentence

d) it makes it a request

4. Listen to this sentence and pick the correct translation

a) there's nothing here.

b) everything is here.

c) what else is here?

d) have you got it?

5. To put a sentence into the pas t tense, what do we do?

a) add 啲 after the verb

b) add 紧 after the verb

c) add 咗 after the verb

d) add 唔 at the end of the sentence

6. Which of the following is NOT the translation of “where are my glasses”?

a) 我眼鏡去咗邊啊

b) 我眼鏡喺邊啊

c) 我眼鏡響邊啊

d) 我眼鏡咩邊啊？

7. Which of the following means stupid?

a) 冇面

b) 冇錢

c) 冇時間

d) 冇腦

8. Listen to the sentence and pick the correct translation

a) She's so smart and you don't want her?

b) You're so smart and you fail?

c) You're so smart and she dumped you?

d) You're too smart to get her?

9. Cantonese has many ways of expressing gratitude. Which of the following is not one of them?

a) 多謝

b) 真係冇所謂

c) 真係唔該

d) 好感激你

10. What's the best way of telling someone you're really full?

a) 全部啃得落

b) 真係好好食

c) 真係啃唔落

d) 真係唔該晒

11. Listen to the number and pick the correct one:

a) 29738

b) 18370

c) 28370

d) 19738

12. What does 你仲食 imply?

a) please help yourself.

b) why would you like this dish?

c) you've eaten a lot already.

d) this is delicious.

13. To turn a number into its ordinal form (5th, 6th, etc.), do the following:

a) add 個 to the end

b) reduplicate the number

c) add 第 before the number

d) add 次 to the end

14. Which of the following is NOT a way of asking for permission:

a) O唔OK

b) 可唔可以

c) 啃唔啃得落

d) 得唔得

15. Chow Yun Fat's greatest film was:

a) A Better Tomorrow 英雄本色

b) Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon 臥虎藏龍

c) All About Ah-Long 阿郎的故事

d) Let The Bullets Fly 讓⼦彈飛

Answers: 1 - b, 2 - a, 3 - a, 4 - a, 5 - c, 6 - d, 7 - d, 8 - b, 9 - b, 10 - c, 11 - c, 12 - c, 13 - c, 14 - c, 15 - a.

We'd been cornered outside a 7/11 and were getting a lecture on professional ethics. "It's a simple exchange," the professor said. "You contribute a little bit to the cause and we're endlessly grateful in return." Our thoughts on this gentleman's forwardness notwithstanding, the prospect of such a boundless return on investment did stimulate a little charity on our part.

Learning Cantonese? You've probably noticed by now that most native Cantonese speakers have around a million ways of saying thanks. We strongly suspect that some are even paid professionally to dream up more each day in order to confuse tourists, mainlanders and everyone else passing through the city. But fortunately, there are only a few dozen variants in common usage, and in this podcast we'll set you right so you know how and when to use them.

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Now that you've lived in Hong Kong for a day or two, you might feel the need to venture out to buy some essentials like food, clothing and water. In other countries this would be a pretty routine affair. Go down to the corner store, flash that winning smile and walk out with your arms full of free goods. Sadly, in Hong Kong's relentlessly capitalist society, people expect you to pay.

And that's where this lesson comes in. Regardless of whether you're haggling ten bucks off the price of that Dongguan shirt or trying to save twenty cents on your next purchase of life-giving mango juice, you'll need to know how to talk about money in Cantonese. Which is why we spend our lesson today covering the money, learning how to talk about prices, and then demanding lower prices repeatedly and insistently, although we leave the yelling and screaming up to you.

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This podcast is dedicated to a certain ex-coworker of ours known widely throughout Hong Kong for his uncanny abilities in the art of pen theft. No matter how many we'd buy or where we'd hide them, by the end of the week every single writing instrument in the office would have magically gravitated to his desk. And he was always on the hunt for more.

If you're just getting started learning Cantonese, this podcast will be a bit advanced for you; get started by listening to our Critical Phrases series for Absolute Beginners. Once you've worked through them, join us here for a quick look at asking to borrow things, as well as another way to make requests in general. And if you have any questions or comments, feel free to write us at [email protected] or leave a note in our discussion section below.

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Learning Cantonese? This lesson is about the art of the denial. Which is highly-critical language you may just find yourself using the next time you sweep through Hong Kong on business, or just want to disavow any knowledge once again of that little incident it would be best if everyone just forgot. Because it was years ago. And who is really keeping track, anyway?

Also... do you remember that earlier lesson in which we learned that Cantonese speakers are particularly fond of turning odd emotional exclamations into high frequency words? Well heavens if there isn't another example lurking in this lesson, along with a dramatic Cantonese dialogue that is several degrees towards strange. But we think you'll enjoy it. So listen in, and good luck!

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We've heard women complain that Hong Kong men can't be romantic, and then we've heard the same men complain about the same women that they just don't appreciate the finer things in life. So we don't really know where we stand, except that when it comes time for planning a romantic night out, you're probably best off avoiding our advice and steering by your own compass.

Want to learn Cantonese? In today's elementary Cantonese lesson, we cover a lot of damn useful vocabulary for finding your way through the rocky shoals of dating, and if you're learning Cantonese this lesson is pretty much a must hear. But if you need more motivation, we've got it too in the form of an easy way to turn perfectly innocuous statements into emotional accusations that you've been deceived. We look forward to hearing how you put it into practice!

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In our introduction series, we taught you the most simple way to ask where things are in Cantonese. In this lesson, we introduce another way to find out who has taken your stuff. This is the difference between asking "where is my wallet" and "where's my wallet gone". The first is emotionally neutral, while the second is more colloquial and signals your frustration with the fact that you clearly placed the damn thing on the desk last night and it doesn't have legs so where on earth could it have gone?

Our beginner Cantonese lessons are all dialogue-based lessons that move at the speed you'll hear Cantonese spoken in Hong Kong. So if you're totally new to Cantonese you may find this a bit difficult to dissect. So if you're learning and want to practice these sentences over and over, be sure to visit our online transcript and vocabulary pages, where every sentence and word in our dialogue is accompanied by special audio recordings you can play over and over again. And let us know if you have any questions in the comment section below!

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