In this week’s episode of Off Topic, we’re diving headfirst into the chaos of modern life — online and offline. First up: the algorithm doesn’t reward ghosting — I’ll tell you why your first 15 minutes after posting are more important than the post itself. Then, I’m sounding the alarm on unhinged DIY trends (hanger chandeliers? Coffee-stained drywall? We’ve gone too far).

Also: can we stop putting cottage cheese in everything?! I’m all for high-protein hacks, but not every dessert needs curds.

And of course, I’m closing with this week’s Country Music Weekly, where I share why I want to be reincarnated as one of Jelly Roll’s farm animals — no seriously, they’re living the dream.

Buckle up. It’s unfiltered, it’s hilarious, and it’s Off Topic.