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Long-term projects can feel like nothing's moving - until you know where to look. This episode is about training your eye to spot the small shifts that mean things are working. 

It's easy to lose steam on a long-term project when progress feels invisible. In this episode, Jessica and Erin talk about why momentum is often hard to see in the moment - and why noticing it matters, not just for morale, but for spotting what's actually working so you can build on it.

This practice helps you find momentum in your own community or project: what's moving forward, what's growing, and what conversations are happening now that weren't six months ago. 

Erin also shares what to do when you can't see any momentum at all - including a simple way to check in with others and revisit the question down the road.

Links and resources from this episode:

• Practicing Connection episode, "Putting Your Icebreakers to Work"

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It's easy to talk about 'the system' like it's something happening to us. But what if you're already standing inside it - and holding one of the levers?

We often talk about "the system" as something distant - a force acting on us rather than something we're part of. In this episode, Erin and Jessica offer a practice for stepping onto the balcony to see your place inside a system you're frustrated with or curious about, whether that's at work, in your community, or even in your own evening routine.

Building on ideas from a past episode on network mapping and borrowing from Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey's Immunity to Change framework, this practice walks through mapping your actual points of contact within a system, identifying where you might have real leverage, and naming the hidden commitment that may be keeping things exactly as they are. 

It's less about assigning blame and more about finding your specific foothold for change.

Links and resources from this episode:

• Immunity to Change framework: https://www.gse.harvard.edu/hgse100/story/changing-better
• Practicing Connection episode, "Who's Missing From Your Network?"

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Whether you're planning a single meeting or inviting people into a long-term community change effort, the invitation is where it succeeds or fails. Here are five principles to get it right.

Invitations aren't just logistics - they're where a gathering succeeds or falls apart before it even starts. 

In this episode, Jessica and Erin dig into why a well-crafted invitation saves time, keeps efforts on track, and empowers people to actually participate, whether you're inviting someone to a single event or into a long-term community change effort. 

Drawing on Priya Parker's The Art of Gathering, they walk through five principles for better invitations: letting your purpose act as both bouncer and recruiter, removing (or naming) barriers to full participation, matching your invitation to the participation you actually want, being clear about what's in it for the invitee, and never skipping the practical details. 

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What does collective impact work actually look like? 

In this interview episode, we hear from a statewide “backbone” organization and a local coalition working in tandem to make changes on early childhood education and child care access. 

We dig into how it works on the ground, what it takes to sustain it over time, and what other communities might learn from it.

Today’s guests are Eric Hale from Early Matters Texas and Tessa Harlin from Early Matters San Antonio. 

Eric serves as the Director of Business Partnerships and Strategy for Early Matters Texas, where he leads business engagement strategy and helps regional coalitions grow support for their work from the business sector. 

Tessa is focused on improving educational outcomes and ensuring equitable access to high-quality early learning for all children in San Antonio and Bexar County.

Links and resources from this episode:

• Early Matters Texas: https://earlymatterstx.org/
• Early Matters San Antonio: https://earlymatterssa.org/ 

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How do you get to the important conversations faster?

Sometimes getting to know a new collaborator can take more time that you have to spare. In this episode Erin and Jessica discuss how a cheat sheet can jumpstart the conversations that build understanding. 

Then Erin walks you through how to write your own. 

Links and resources from this episode:

• Create Your Own Cheat Sheet handout: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1si32FVO0z-upqBhwJOelTi40G4kDcxdAqIBhnskRWrU/edit?usp=sharing

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What if the person frustrating you isn't missing a strength - just misusing one? 

In this episode of Practicing Connection, Jessica and Erin walk through a practical, evidence-based way to find the strength that's showing up in the wrong dose, instead of landing on judgment.

Drawing on positive psychology researcher Ryan Niemiec's concept of the "golden mean," they use a shared pet peeve as a live test case - generating multiple strengths-based stories for a moment that would normally just cause frustration. The goal isn't to excuse bad behavior or talk yourself out of a boundary - it's to see people more completely, stay collaborative, and keep working with them instead of writing them off.

Useful for anyone who works with people day to day - supporting military families, leading a team, or building community - especially in the moments someone shows up with negative energy, or you're already bracing for it.

Links and resources from this episode:

• viacharacter.org
• List of all 24 strengths with descriptions: https://www.viacharacter.org/resources/activities/the-via-classification-of-twenty-four-character-strengths

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What do you do after you listen to understand someone else?

It can be a real challenge to figure out how to collaborate with someone who only complains. Listening to understand is a great first step, but what do you do next?

How do you move the conversation forwards? 

Join us for this episode of Practicing Connection, where Erin and Jessica dive into a new way to respond when faced with negativity. Then Erin will introduce a fast and fun activity called Positive Rants that teaches you how to positively reframe negativity so you can talk about what comes next. 

Links and resources from this episode:

• Finger Exercises for Poets: https://www.doriannelaux.net/finger-exercises-for-poets
• You Are Not So Smart Podcast: https://youarenotsosmart.com/ 
• YANSS Episode 341 - Positive Rants- Heather Barnes: https://podscan.fm/podcasts/you-are-not-so-smart/episodes/341-positive-rants-heather-barnes 

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Many professionals want to help military families. Few understand the invisible barriers they're navigating.

When service members and military families transition to civilian life, they're often told to expect "culture shock." But according to counselor and researcher Dr. Seth Hayden, that phrase doesn't fully capture what's actually happening.

In this episode, Jessica Beckendorf and guest co-host Kim Smith explore the military-civilian divide with Dr. Hayden, whose work focuses on the intersection of career development and mental health for service members, veterans, and military families.

Together, they discuss:

• Why military transition is about more than employment
• What civilian providers often misunderstand about military culture
• The hidden challenges veterans face when translating military experience into civilian opportunities
• How spouses experience transition differently than service members
• Why career struggles and mental health concerns are often part of the same story
• Practical ways professionals can better support military-connected families

Whether you work with military families or simply want to better understand the transition experience, this conversation offers valuable insights into what it takes to bridge the divide.

Dr. Seth Hayden is a professor of counseling and coordinator of the clinical mental health program at Wake Forest University. 

His research sits right at the intersection of career development and mental health, with a particular focus on the career and personal development needs of military service members, veterans, and their families, including some recent work specifically on military spouses navigating the transition to civilian life.

Links and resources from this episode:

SpouseWorks: 

• https://spouseworks.militaryonesource.mil/portal/

Dr. Seth Hayden: 

• https://counseling.wfu.edu/faculty-staff/dr-seth-hayden/
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/seth-hayden-wfu/

Clinical Military Counseling: Guidelines for Practice:

• https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/book/10.1002/9781119783527?__cf_chl_tk=KzKEp3QotoNpCKT8u789ZOz.7I__Ea9bfxdNhM3pztc-1787167104-1.0.1.1-bpa3CFcvdvBE1WDaUs_QgQGyUNbLWa6QWC6waQibXUg 
• https://www.counseling.org/publications/aca-books/view/clinical-military-counseling--guidelines-for-practice

Cognitive Information Processing: Career Theory, Research, and Practice:

• https://publishing.lib.fsu.edu/books-textbooks/cognitive-information-processing-career-theory-research-and-practice/ 

Integrating Career Development and Mental Health in Counseling:

• https://www.counseling.org/publications/aca-books/view/integrating-career-development-and-mental-health-in-counseling 

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In this conversation with Tom Mosgaller, we unpack a flexible Change Framework designed for communities of any size or location. Tom explains why relationships and taking action together are central, and how aligning desire, vision, power, and action can help us all overcome resistance and move toward a brighter future.

Tom Mosgaller is an experienced community builder, teacher, and leader who believes that relationships are the cornerstone of strong, vibrant communities. 

Tom has led, taught, and coached community builders in places both big and small, urban and rural, locally and internationally. He’s also co-author of Pulling Together: A Handbook for Community Change and Bending Granite: 30+ True Stories of Leading Change.

Links and resources from this episode:

• Tom on LinkedIn
• https://www.pulling-together.com/ 
• On the Importance of Being Unprincipled: https://www.jstor.org/stable/41206444
• Reveille For a New Generation https://actapublications.com/reveille-for-a-new-generation/ 

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When child care is hard to find and harder to afford, some communities aren't waiting for a fix. 

Kristin Forde Hurckes of the University of Wisconsin-Madison Extension Center for Cooperative explains how cooperative models are helping - and where they hit their limits. 

Kristin Forde Hurckes is part of the team of Cooperative Development Specialists at the UW Center who supports worker cooperatives in rural community, with an emphasis on worker cooperative conversions. 

She emphasizes the importance of both individual and collective commitment to the significant cultural and organizational change that is required to shift toward democratic and participatory decision making. 

Kristin enjoys learning about the many creative ways cooperatives organize and structure themselves; and developing effective formats for group processes.

Links and resources from this episode:

• UW Madison Center for Cooperatives 
• Childcare Cooperative Resources 
• Cooperative Development Services
• ICA Group Childcare Resources
• Energy Capital Cooperative Childcare
• Nestling House

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